To my boyfriend, best friend, and better half:
Having known you since we were fifteen, I had no idea we would be here. You’ll never let me forget I broke your heart five years ago, but I’m sure glad that my nineteen-year-old self finally saw our potential. We’ve always been best friends, but we were always different. You were the troublemaker in class and I was a “nerd” (your words), you played football and I was a dancer, and the list goes on. Somehow though, despite the differences, we somehow always just clicked together. We went through different phases of not being close, but we always had a silent agreement that we’d be there for each other whenever it was needed.
When we first started to date, it was honestly a weird adjustment. We had spent so long as friends that when it came down to actually being together, it was a different dynamic and not something I think either of us were used to. We didn’t have the “getting to know each other” phase because as best friends, we knew almost everything already. Although it was strange at first, it still continues to be one of the best things about our relationship. We will always be best friends first. Being with you has been easy because there is no question that we know each other and we accept that always.
The hardest part was walking into our relationship with baggage. Even though we had been there for each other through the baggage, we weren’t exactly prepared to experience it firsthand. I spent my freshman year of college at my absolute lowest point with little to no love for myself, used to being put second, cheated on… I was flat out heartbroken. You had also fallen out of a broken relationship and to put it simply, you were angry and also had little faith in relationships. I couldn’t find myself to be lovable and you were used to fighting at every moment, waiting for me to make a mistake. It was difficult to find a common ground, but I couldn’t be more thankful that you tackled our baggage head on with me. People get so caught up in what people choose to put on social media that it’s easy to forget relationships aren’t always easy. By no means did we magically get rid of our pain from past experiences, but you were so patient, understanding, and willing to move forward to a point where the past has little space in our relationship.
You’ve taught me so much about myself and influenced my outlook on the world every day. I’m always in awe of how much you inspire me to be the best version of myself. You have never made me feel that I was by any means unlovable and with that, I’ve learned to love myself more and more, something I didn’t see as possible. Your heart is my absolute favorite thing about you. It may be covered by your masculine persona, but your compassion and loyalty to those who mean a lot to you will always be your best quality. I’m thankful to be lucky enough to experience it first hand. You’ve always made sure that I never have to handle any problem alone. With every moment, you are my biggest supporter and I couldn’t do half of what I have without you by my side. With every obstacle that has hit us, through any rough patch, we’ve always grown. Especially the past couple months, we’ve had the most growth I ever thought possible. It’s so assuring to know that I have someone who’s willing to be not perfect, but normal with me.
Overall, thank you for being you. Thank you for putting my heart back together and thank you for taking on the chaos a relationship brings. You are absolutely all I could ask for in a man and I’m lucky to have you by my side.
I love you, Happy Valentine’s Day.
Xo
