When I tell people I’m an only child I can without a doubt expect a reaction. People love to share their opinions on the subject or let their curiosity loose with a myriad of questions. This is always funny for me because it’s just my life, it’s something I’m so used to. One thing is for sure though, it can be a good conversation starter.
People sometimes say “You seem like you have siblings”. Hearing this actually make me so happy because it means that I have succeeded in hiding my symptoms of only child syndrome (you know what I’m talking about, being self-centered, anti-social and spoiled). Seriously though, I take this as a compliment because of the negative connotation associated with being an only child. When I hear this, it’s equivalent to being told that I’m social, outgoing, kind and down to Earth. So I typically respond to this with a thank you.
When people tell me that I “totally seem like an only child” I usually think oh goodness no, what have I done wrong. Sometimes if I’m in the mood for a round about insult I ask why. People usually stumble over their words looking for an answer that isn’t offensive and come up with something like you’re independent. Usually I just take this and run with it, convincing myself that people think I’m independent, even though they probably actually meant that I’m a little bit of a brat and don’t know how to share. Genuinely, this doesn’t really insult me even though I understand the connotation. I know that I have my stereotypical only child moments, in fact I point these moments out and have a good laugh about them.
A common question is “Why don’t you have siblings?” Really though, this should be a question for my parents, not me. Honestly this question could be really personal for some people, you never know. Some families may have financial or health related reasons for only having one child. In many cases though, like my own, the parents just only wanted to have one.
Many people tell me how being an only child seems “sad and lonely”. I have never thought of my life as being sad or lonely.Not having siblings certainly doesn’t make me feel gloomy or socially deprived. I have a great relationship with my parents, plenty of friends and activities to fill my time with. There are less people at home to get into fights with, no siblings to be compared to and more undivided attention from my parents.
There is also the assumption that I must get whatever I want. In case you’re wondering if this is true the answer is a hard no, I most certainly do not. I always wanted a trampoline. It’s been 19 years and there’s still no trampoline. Creating a spoiled child really just depends on the parents, I do have a lot of things I have wanted but I definitely have to put in work for some of those things. There are kids with siblings who have everything their hearts have ever desired and only children who are ridiculously spoiled as well. It is not dependent on the amount of kids, but the parenting style.
Every once in awhile I come across a person who says “You’re so lucky that you don’t have siblings, it must be so great”. I thrive on this. Never do I let this rare opportunity go to waste, instead I give whoever it is an ear-full about the benefits of being an only child. Even though I know they’re probably just saying that because they just had a fight with their older brother, their little sister won’t stop borrowing their clothes without asking or their parents keep comparing them to their genius brother who has perfect grades and perfect hair. Therefore, this moment is fleeting so I try to disprove as many only child misconceptions as I can.
Another point of interest seems to be asking me if I like getting all of the attention from my parents, or if it’s excessive. Here’s what I have to say I do receive tons of attention from my parents and I absolutely love it. Yeah, sometimes my parents ask me too many questions, my mom wants to take too many pictures or they worry too much; but I don’t see any of it as negative. They’re just showing me that they love and care about me by giving me that attention. Sometimes it may frustrate me a bit, but overall it’s encouraging. My parents are always willing to listen to me and acknowledge my accomplishments. If anything it strengthens my relationship with my parents, and I greatly appreciate that.
Last but most definitely not least common, people ask me if I wish I had siblings. Sure I had my phases when I thought I wanted a brother or sister, I even tried to convince my parents to adopt a sibling for me once. By the time I was in high school however, I began to really value being an only child. There were a lot of positives for me and I’m happy. I would not go back and change that for anything, I love my little family of three.
