Saying Goodbye To A Relationship
Dating

The 3-Year-Long Goodbye

If in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy.

623
Maggie Feldhaus

There is finally a "the end," riding off into the sunset, happily ever after. There is definite closing of the book, and I finally accepted that our ending actually helped me. I'm the kind of person that desires a mutually peaceful ending to a relationship. To start, I want you to know that whenever you came into my life, I believe it was the right time and place. Things fall into place and happen for a specific purpose, and that includes what we had. I learned things about life, love, and loss from you. I'm now grateful for the things you taught me, whether they were lessons that hurt or pleasant surprises; in some way or another, it all made me better.The worst part about not having closure is the unknown--we never got to read the epilogue of the story or hear that last note of the song. I finally came to terms that, I don't need you to have my own closure. There are days when I miss who I was when I was with you; when I miss what we had. It's hard to say what I think would have been, but then again, what does it matter now? We can't focus on the what-ifs and the if only's. If we think in terms of that, the reality of what we had will fade and feel like another uncharted territory. I am completely thankful our relationship feels like a past life or a faint remembrance.

When I say I miss what we had, I mean I miss the good times. Not the times you cheated on me, lied to me, used me, mentally and emotionally abused me, and failed to give me what I truly deserved. Part of me will always wonder "why?", but then I remember: you were already broken. Your dad was an addict who died before you were 10. Even if he was around he wasn't capable to show you what a man really is made of. Your mom, the woman who chose alcohol over you and drank herself into a stroke and left you and your three siblings to figure this life out all by yourselves. And we can't forget about your druggie brothers and your promiscuous sister. Who were you to fall on when times got bad? That's right. Your equally f*cked douche bag friends. Oh! Remember that one time your drunken friend shot in me the foot point blank with an airsoft gun and I slapped him, but you got mad at me because I slapped him? Or that time you left me to go party with your friends? Or even better when I was your wedding date but you cancelled on me the day of to go fuck some random whore at the wedding. In the end I can not be mad at you anymore. It may have taken me three years, but I have finally realized everything you did and said that hurt me was simply because you were already broken. To this day, you still deny the fact that anything you did was wrong.

In the beginning, you made me feel like I was the only girl in you world. You made me feel like I was everything and all to you. These feelings faded away quickly when you let your ego get in the way of our relationship. You hated me within weeks of us being together, you made me go behind my parents' backs, belittled me, and abused me mentally. Love blinded me of the ways that you made me feel, it blinded me of the words that you used every time words came out of your mouth, it blinded me of the way that you treated my friends and family, and it blinded me of the way that you treated me

In the end, after three years. I can finally say goodbye, and honestly say you have no control over me anymore. But please know, I wish you the best in everything you pursue. I hope I made a healthier impact on your life than you made on mine, I hope you remember me as a girl you should've treated better and learn from that. I hope someone never abuses you like you did me and I hope you find happiness in your new life. Most of all I hope you find help and mend yourself into a healthy man that is capable of love and peace. I know you have it in you, you just have to want it. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy.

-The girl who is finally ready to say goodbye

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Taylar Banks

May 25, 2020: the day that will forever be remembered as the day George Floyd lost his life at the hands of cops.

The day that systematic racism again reared its head at full force in 2020.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

These 17 Black-Owned Businesses Ship Baked Goods, Rosé, And Even Fried Chicken Nationwide

Eat your way through this country's greatest food — from your couch.

Call it the easily bored Gemini in me, but I'm constantly looking for new food to try. Usually, travel quenches my taste for new and exciting cuisines, but given the fact that international travel is not always a possibility, I've begun exploring alternatives.

In the interest of wanting to support the Black community and Black-owned businesses, and also wanting to try some of the country's greatest food without having to get off my couch, I started off (pessimistically) doing research, only to find that the options were vast.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

24 Beauty And Style Brands Donating To The Fight To End Police Brutality Against Black People

From small, boutique brands to legacy fashion brands.

The worlds of beauty and fashion often collide, whether for good or bad. In both, underrepresentation has always been, and remains to be, a major unresolved issue. After the recent killing of George Floyd, many people are rightfully enraged, compounded by the fact his death in police custody wasn't an isolated incident.

Police brutality against Black people is not new, and isn't going away till we start dedicating resources to fighting it. Many of us, as individuals, have only begun in the last week scratching the surface of what it means to educate ourselves on race, historical race relations, and how to be an ally to the Black community.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Feel A Lil' Better: Because You Can Still Connect While Disconnecting From Social Media

Your weekly wellness boost from Odyssey.

No matter how good (or bad) you'd describe your health, one thing is for sure: a little boost is ALWAYS a good idea. Whether that's reading a new, motivating book, or listening to a song that speaks to your soul, there are plenty of resources to help your health thrive on any given day.

I don't know if you've heard, but there's a lot going on right now, particularly in relation to George Floyd's death, Black Lives Matter, and public protest of racial injustice in the United States. While we can all agree that this deserves conversations, change, and actionable good, social media arguments with Great Aunt Linda are not where social change begins and ends. Spending too much time scrolling through your phone has never been healthy, but now it's even more addicting — what does that one person from my hometown say about this? How can I further education within discussions? Am I posting enough?

Keep Reading... Show less

I don't know about you, but reading is at the top of my to-do list this summer... especially with all the social distancing I'll still be doing. If, like me, you're hoping to pick up a romantic page-turner (or a couple dozen), here are 23 romance novels by Black authors you'll absolutely LOVE reading.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

22 Black-Owned Etsy Shops With The Perfect Gifts For Everyone In Your Life — Including You

Treat yourself and your loved ones while supporting Black creatives and artisans.

R-KI-TEKT, Pontie Wax, Lovely Earthlings, and blade + bloom on Etsy

The world is taking action against the injustices and under-representation plaguing Black lives, and one small but impactful thing you can do to actively make a difference is support Black-owned businesses.

Etsy is likely one of your go-to sites for gift-buying, but have you ever paid attention to which independent artists and sellers you're buying from?

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

True Self-Care Is HARD, That Face Mask Isn't Actually Going To Solve Your Problems

There's a line between self-care and self-destruction.

Anyone who hasn't been living under a rock for the past few years has seen something somewhere about self-care whether it was on Facebook, Twitter, or their Instagram feed. Oftentimes it's pictures of celebrities or influencers sipping green smoothies or slathering on mud masks with #selfcare. It's posts like these that made me realize that "self-care" has become the ultimate buzz word, soaring in popularity but in the process, it's lost most of its original meaning. It's time to set the record straight and reclaim the term.

Although self-care has been around for quite some time, within the past few years it's been misconstrued and commodified as our capitalist society tends to do with things it thinks can be profited off. Self-care is now being peddled as something that can be bought and sold on the shelf at Target rather than something that takes real work to achieve. This fake self-care movement is not only enabling people to over-indulge themselves, but it has created a crutch for people to avoid the responsibility of taking true care of themselves. Instead of doing the work that needs to be done, many people fall into the trap of rewarding themselves for doing nothing at all — this can quickly become an unhealthy coping mechanism, especially with corporations cheering us on (to buy their next product). Long, hard day at work? Just grab your third iced coffee of the day! Fight with your SO? Buy that 50-dollar face mask, it'll make you feel better! This is how self-care becomes self-sabotage and self-destructive.

Keep Reading... Show less

Minorities are consistently under-represented in our day-to-day lives, notably in the world of fashion. It's likely you're looking for a way to support black artists. Whether that's the case or you're just a fashion-lover in general, these brands aren't just some of the best black-owned fashion brands — they're some of the most innovative brands of our time, period.

From luxury staples to fun accessories and loungewear, these brands aren't just stunning names you should definitely be following on Instagram, each honors the founder's roots in unique ways with the power of storytelling through artistic expression that manifests in pieces we can't wait to wear.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments