I Am Not A Burden

I take medicine for anxiety and depression. I take medicine for ADHD. I have had an eating disorder, and still struggle with it daily. But even though these were the cards I was dealt, I am not a burden.

I am not a burden when I feel so sad that I cry for no reason. Seriously, sometimes I just cry, and I couldn't tell you what is wrong.

I am not a burden when I feel so absolutely exhausted that getting out of bed hurts.

I am not a burden when I can't focus on anything someone is saying because my mind won't slow down.

I am not a burden when I look in the mirror and don't like what I see.

I am not a burden when I don't make plans because the thought of being social stresses me out and already has me feeling exhausted.

I am not a burden for hating small talk.

I am not a burden for avoiding going out in public.

I am not a burden for loving being alone.

I am not a burden for worrying and overthinking easily.

I am not a burden when I have a panic attack.

I am not a burden because I have to work harder than most people in school because my brain struggles to focus on one thing at a time.

I am not a burden because I struggle opening up to others, and making friends.

I am not a burden because I over analyze every bit of food I put in my mouth.

I am not a burden because I am terrified to step on a scale.

I am not a burden for walking into a room and automatically thinking that everyone is judging me/hates me.

I am not a burden for being quiet and reserved because I am over thinking.

I am not a burden for struggling with making a decision.

I am not a burden for being defensive of my feelings.

I am not a burden for hating being called crazy, whether it's joking or not.

I am not a burden for being just plain tired, mentally, emotionally, physically.

I am not a burden because I bite my nails.

I am not a burden because I hate seeing people I know out in public.

I am not a burden because I hate change.

I am not a burden. Period.

I use to think I was too much of a mess for people to handle. I hated opening up about my struggles. Either people didn't understand, or it made them uncomfortable, or they just didn't want to deal with me. But that's the thing.. I am not my struggles. I am not my burdens. Yes, I have burdens but they are not me. The people I need in my life are the ones that see my struggles and embrace me with open arms regardless of what they are. They are the ones that bring me comfort and are patient and encouraging to me through my valleys when my burdens feel heavy, and happy and cheer me on when I'm at my peaks when the burdens are light. I am who God made me to be. He allowed me to be dealt with these cards so that I might trust and lean on Him whole heartedly. He will give me rest, and comfort, and tell me how precious I am. He is the carrier of my burdens.

Going through these things helps me to be more understanding and empathetic of others as well, so they might see that they are not alone in their struggles, and I can point them to God, the one who wants to take away the many burdens that we carry in this human life.

You yourself are not a burden for dealing with any kind of mental illness or hormone imbalance, or emotional struggle of any kind. You feel the way you do for a reason. You are not a mess. You are not too much to handle. You may carry burdens but God can take them away. He can carry the weight of them for you. You are loved. You are perfectly you. You are not your burdens. And God can make you burdenless.