Are you a glass-half-full or glass half-empty kind of person?
To me, the answer is entirely meaningless. I don't believe there's a such thing. This is a nature versus nurture kind of debate, and for this round I will be taking the side of nurture.
Do not get me wrong, I do firmly believe that everyone is born predisposed to a certain temperament, and this is undoubtedly nature. But, what I mean to talk about is so much more than that. Positivity is a learned, developed, and active skill to be practiced.
You know the kind of person with a tendency to speak of what went wrong that day as a point of conversation starter? The same people who make it a point to fill their news feed with negativity and complaints? The kind of people who enjoy getting riled-up about something and they feed off of anger and disapproval? This is a learned behavior. At some point in their lives, they learned that discussion of negative topics often leads to attention. And perhaps for them, this was the easiest and most readily available form of attention. Behavior analysis shows us that people will nearly always choose the easiest form of reinforcement, unless given an appealing alternative.
This is where I suggest to you, that some are taught to use positivity as a source of attention instead. This act may not be satiating at first, for it is forced. It is forced, and it takes active effort to recognize the positivity and withhold speaking about the downsides of your day. When one is used to focusing on the negative, is usually brings down their day. It's an entire shift in perspective: counting blessings instead of downfalls. Eventually, it becomes clear that the negative things that happen each day are nothing in comparison to what you have going for you in your life.
So, maybe the reinforcement becomes less instantaneous. Maybe you post less often, maybe you have less easy conversation starters. What do you do in the meantime? Begin asking others how they are doing. Begin encouraging others online. Begin to be the positivity in someone else's day, that they may not have been able to see otherwise. Work on yourself every day, making your small triumphs in private. And when you are truly proud, and you want to share this with others, you will find that speaking about the positive things in your life will always get far more attention than a complaint. Have the goal not be to hear, "I'm so sorry", but instead, "I am so proud of you". Let the positivity mean more to you, and let the little downfalls of every day life slip away from you as soon the moment passes.
Ask yourself, "Will this moment matter to me 5 years from now"?
If the answer is no, let it go. Your emotions matter, but once practicing a positive outlook, you'll find that you're upset much less often. And in turn, you can be a light to others. No one is glass-half-full. Sometimes when the glass is empty, we have to teach ourselves to be thankful that we have a glass for the next time water is available.
