I speak three languages: English, decent Spanish, and a foreign language to sexual assailants- No.
Who knew one word could have such various definitions, creating a language of its own that's left up for interpretation?
BREAKING NEWS: "No" means nothing more than NO.
"No" doesn't mean:
1. Yes
2. Coerce me
3. Force me
4. Get mad at me
5. Convince me
6. Touch me
7. Undress me
8. I'm playing hard to get
9. Try me
10. Arouse me
11. Beg me
12. Trap me
13. Expose me
14. Make me feel obligated
15. Shower me in bullshit compliments
16. Stare at me with eyes full of expectation, and wait for me to speak/move due to discomfort
17. Weaken me
18. Wait for me to get more tired
19. Maybe
20. Yes (Indeed, I felt the need to add this again, because some people need more clarification apparently)
"No" DOES NOT MEAN MAYBE. "Maybe" DOES NOT MEAN YES. "Yes" DOES NOT MEAN I CANNOT CHANGE MY MIND LATER ON.
Rape culture may be modernizing and lines may appear more blurred than ever, but "no" always has, and always will mean NO.
You are always allowed to say "no". Never feel obligated to even mutter a "maybe".
No matter if you are dating, engaged, married, a stripper, or labeled a "slut", your "no" needs to be recognized. Nothing can give consent other than yourself, by saying "Yes". Your clothes, make-up, promiscuity, relationship, nor anything else can give consent for you.
If you or someone you know has been the victim of sexual assault or need someone to talk to, please call the National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-4673.
You are not in this alone.
"No" is supposed to be enough. Don't blame yourself, there is enough victim blaming going on this world already.