Remember that one event that you felt like it ruined you? That traumatic event that will stay a part of your life forever. It can be months or years down the road and you still feel the pain. We all have those moments. The moments where we still hurt.
Whether it's from a death, a breakup, or any traumatic event, we still feel the pain as if it just happened. The stinging, heart-breaking pain that feels as if it will never go away. You feel as though your heart is physically breaking in two. Your friends notice your suffering but they don't know how to help.
You don't know how to help yourself, either. You don't know who to talk to, what to talk about, or why you keep feeling as though you're worthless. You feel as though the traumatic event was your fault. You feel like you did something to break off the relationship. You feel like you didn't see the person that died enough. You feel like the reason that your best friend isn't your best friend anymore is because of you. It's always you. In all reality, it's not.
The recovery process is the hardest process to be successful in. No one wants to go through it. No one wants to go through the pain. The confusion of what to do after the pain is gone. Constant suffering. The feeling of worthlessness and being depressed. Never feeling good enough. Not wanting to take on each and every day. You want to feel better. It all starts with you. You are in control of your life and of the way you're feeling. Don't let your sad feelings be in control of your life. Take a deep breath when you feel pain. Get all of the negative energy out. Cry if you need to. Nobody will judge you. All you truly need is reassurance. It will be okay.
You constantly feel as though the world wouldn't miss you if you were gone. Your family, your friends, even your dog would miss you. People who you probably don't even notice would miss you. You have to put yourself in someone else's shoes. If your friend left the world, wouldn't you miss them with every ounce in your body? Exactly. You would. So why would you want to do that to those around you?
For those who never recovered or don't feel like recovering is the right process for them, don't hold down your feelings. Holding in your feelings could make you develop depression, which is an even harder task to recover from. If you don't want to talk, write down your feelings in a journal. It will at least help release the stress at that moment. Once you're done with the journal, you can keep it safe somewhere or show someone. They can read it and it'll help them understand how you're feeling. If you don't want to share it, you can always look back and reflect. The more you write down, the better chance of getting the painful feelings to go away.
Life will get better. The pain will stop. Getting over that traumatic event could seem like the hardest thing in the world. It's not. You can do it. You can overcome and end the constant pain and torture that you put amongst yourself. You can do it. It all starts with you.
