In today's social-media infested world, it's hard to scroll through your Facebook or Twitter feed and not find a post making fun of someone. Normally, the videos or pictures are taken unbeknownst to the victim, and the caption is condemning the victim’s appearance or behavior. In the past, I would laugh at these kind of posts with my friends. I've realized this made me a hypocrite, as I do consider myself to be tolerant of others decisions in regards to how they choose to live their lives. Yet, when it came to these popular posts, I would still giggle at images of older women who appeared to purchase their entire wardrobe from Forever 21.
The post that really made me consider my actions was about a mother and daughter shopping together. The mother has her daughter strapped into a carrier on her back. While the original premise of the image seems harmless, it generated hundreds of hateful responses because the girl was five years old. Many critiqued this woman's parenting skills, even though they had never met her before in person. I tried to put myself in the shoes of the mother, who later came out and said her daughter just wasn't feeling very well. She was just trying to make her daughter feel better. I also imagined how the little girl would feel in a few years if she ever stumbled across the post of her and her mother. The thought of reading hateful, judgmental comments about someone I loved made my skin crawl.
Despite the fact that I've never initiated one of these posts myself, I realized I was no better than all of the original posters. Who am I to judge what others do?
I've been challenging myself for the past few weeks, trying to get myself to quiet those comments in my head. And you know what? IT WORKS! I've noticed a change in how I think about others. I've mostly quieted the judgmental, devil-on-my-shoulder inner voice.
Of course, I can’t always agree with how people choose to behave. For example, at the beach this weekend, I saw some parents who did not watch their children very carefully as they bodysurfed after the lifeguards had left for the day. On the boardwalk, I saw someone wearing a t-shirt with an offensive slogan. However, instead of instantly labeling these people as awful human beings, I paused and considered an alternative. Maybe the t-shirt wearer isn’t aware that his shirt could really hurt someone’s feelings. And maybe the kids in the ocean are strong swimmers, or their parents aren’t aware of how quickly you can be swept up by a rough wave.
I challenge you to join me. Think of what you are doing before you make a hurtful post. Wait before you choose to utter a snide remark about someone's appearance or behavior. Don't jump to conclusions about someone you don't know, because there is no way you could possibly know every detail of their personal lives.
