This summer marks my one year anniversary of being single after three years. Though I don’t regret my failed relationship, I have a new appreciation of the single life and everything that it has taught me. Here’s what I've learned.
1. You will meet a whole lot of new people
Especially if you break up before entering a new chapter of your life such as going to college. Just by living in a dormitory, you will meet so many people. Classes and clubs help with finding new, interesting people. Even if you aren’t making a big transition, your friends will introduce and take you out with their other friends and eventually your friend circle will expand.
2. You will try new things
Both good and bad. Whether it be a new type of cuisine or a club that you never thought you’d join, you will try so many things to get your mind off the breakup and your ex. The other thing is, you will WANT to try something different. After the mourning period is over, you will be eager to jump into anything and everything. Being in a relationship, you get into the same old routine and usually have your go-to date spots but being single is like opening a whole new door of activities that you never knew existed.
3. You’ll discover new things about yourself
This kind of ties in with trying new things. You will discover new likes and dislikes and how you operate without a significant other. The time usually spent with a boyfriend/girlfriend will free up and that’s when you figure out what you do with all your spare time. For example, I found that I had a passion for crafting and by the beginning of my first semester of college, I painted about around 30 canvases. Not only did I use it as a distraction, but I found a new passion that I was quite talented at. If your relationship ended on bad terms, don’t forget to evaluate your behavior and response to it all so you can better yourself for your next boyfriend/girlfriend.
4. You will also learn what you want in a significant other
Don’t regret your failed relationship. Instead, use it as a learning tool to figure out what you liked and disliked about your ex so you know to search for those qualities in future mates. You will also realize how much your options have grown and through trying new things and discovering hidden passions, your idea of a perfect boyfriend/girlfriend can and most likely will change. Of course, everyone has their “must have” list but don’t let that stop you from seeing someone who might be perfect for you.
5. You will want to live healthier
The Kardashians call it a “revenge body” but I call it a new lifestyle. Being in a relationship, I never had time to go to the gym nor did I see the point since I was already seeing someone and had nobody else to impress. After my relationship ended and I finished my crying and five pints of ice cream, I wanted to change it up. It was a weird surge of new energy and motivation to be happy again. Most newly singles want to eat healthier and work out because once you jump back into the dating pool, the fish in the sea seem endless and who doesn’t want to impress the potential dates while showing your ex what they’re missing? Not only does it make you feel better but focusing on a new and improved lifestyle will help you get over your ex faster (although results may vary).
6. You will have more time to focus on you
Overall, I learned that I had more “me time” after my breakup. Being single is like dating yourself in the sense of you can’t ever break up with yourself and instead of learning about someone else, you’re learning new things about yourself. Sure, sometimes I miss being in a relationship but I can honestly say that this past year was less stressful and one of the best years of my life. Not being in a relationship gave me freedom I didn’t have while dating someone. I had more spending money since I wasn’t going out on dates every week or buying birthday/anniversary/Christmas/Valentine’s Day gifts. With each passing day, I learned more about who I am and what I want to be. I met new friends and got into a healthier lifestyle.
My perfect guy is out there somewhere but until I find him, I will keep loving who I grew to be and my life as a single lady. So Happy One Year Anniversary to me, myself and I.
