Look how happy we are. I never thought about this day until I had no choice. The day before Thanksgiving and we are making plans of what the day will consist of. I have no choice but to realize that tomorrow when I am surrounded by family, you won't be there. You will be in heaven watching down on us.

I find it very hard to think about what I am thankful for when all I want is for you to be here too. I am very thankful though that I had 18 years and 11 months with you. I have memories with you no one else will ever have. I have one awesome angel watching over me every day.

When it comes to standing around the entire family and listening to everyone say what they are grateful for, jobs or family, I have to hold tears back. Don't get me wrong I love my job. I get to work with kids all day. What could be better? What I struggle with hearing is family. Yes, I love my mom, dad, step-mom, and sisters. My family is broken though. My family just doesn't feel complete without you standing in the circle with us. So instead of family, I say that my parents could give me really awesome siblings. That is something I am and will forever be grateful for. My mom and dad gave me you, Ty.

I think about all the holidays to come and I know Christmas will be the hardest one for me. That is the last family picture I will ever have with you. My heart breaks that I will never get that moment back. I am haunted by the thought of family pictures now, but I know at some point I will move past that.

We both know that holidays in our family are filled with a lot of driving from Mom's to Dad's, laughs, loud music, food, and a lot of love. I wish you were still here to experience that with us, but I hope you enjoy the holidays in heaven!