Mourn The Losses Because They Aren't Insignificant

I think the biggest lie that a person can tell themselves is that they're ok. One of the most cliche thing is "it's ok to not be ok" but it's so incredibly true. Think about it. Think of a situation where you had something so devastating happen. Do you have it? Good. Now think about how not ok you were in that moment.

There's people in the world that think they have to be strong in every situation but that's not true. There's people who think that it's not ok to not have it all together. There's people in this world who believe they aren't allowed to cry. That is wrong.

Every person should be able to mourn loss. Whether a physical, tangible loss or an emotional, mental loss.

In high school I thought I wasn't able to show my true emotions. I was literally a wall. I didn't mourn any kind of loss. I didn't tell myself it was ok to cry, laugh, smile, love, or show happiness. I faked almost every part of who I was- even into college.

My soul still hurts for that girl I was, so broken and sad. Luckily I have a friend who gets me. She went through a lot of the same things and sees most things how I see them. She had self destructive behaviors too but we have grown together. She taught me it is ok to have emotion and process my feelings and show who I really am.

Those car rides and long talks and even the seemingly insignificant times we talked during basketball and soccer seasons with her have shaped so much of my emotional ability to process and I wouldn't be who I am without her friendship. It is not wrong to feel something so deeply that it breaks you. It is not wrong to cry alone or cry with someone. It is not wrong to miss someone or something or a dream or idea you have. Mourn those things now so you don't get bitter but don't stay in that mindset. Don't play the victim because you are more than that.

You are a survivor. You are worthy. You are valuable. Someone out in the world loves you and I'm rooting for you and praying for you but most of all, Jesus loves you. Hold onto that.