Why Modern-Day Feminists Need to Stop Playing the Victim Card

Why Modern-Day Feminists Need to Stop Playing the Victim Card

I am a strong woman and don't feel the need to claim the title of "feminist".
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AH, feminism. What a topic. Wage gaps, the "war on women," and the fight for equality. There are the extremists who believe in women's dominance. And then there are the women who just feed on the agenda of feminism when there really is no point to labeling what this movement is.

I am a strong woman and don't feel the need to claim the title of "feminist."

Okay, now before all the feminists write about how "small-minded" or "uneducated" I am on the topic, why don't you broaden your horizons and let someone else explain their point of view without you shoving your beliefs down our throats? Why don't you take a breather and let the other side of the spectrum share their beliefs (like the first amendment gives you yours!) Okay? Great. Thank you.

Now, no, I don't claim to be a feminist. I was raised to be an independent, strong female who shouldn't need any other person to take care of me. That's how all girls should be raised, but not under the title of "feminist." I truly believe feminist is another way of playing the victim card, but that's just me. I guess I see the world differently than having to play my woman card on everything when it's unnecessary and serves no greater purpose other than back in the early 19th century when women had zero rights, but today? Please. Stop.

I know that feminism is the movement nowadays that doesn't fight for our right to vote since we have that right because of the real feminists back in 1920. Feminism today is somehow a movement for the equality of everyone, but if that's the true core of the cause, why isn't it called humanism? You can be a regular person who believes in the absolute equality of every person. I am not a feminist and I believe everyone should be treated fairly and respectfully, but I need a specific label for that? And I'm confused why feminists thought that it would be a good idea to title something with a female-oriented word? But anyway, next subject.

Feminism is now really just an agenda that liberals have come up with to make voters believe that life here in America is just so hard. Wake up, America! Since I am a woman, I can tell you that life, in general, isn't supposed to be easy, that's how life is, and inequalities can occur anywhere, but living in the United States is a piece of cake in comparison to other countries. There will always be discrimination and racism, not always from the same race of people or gender, but it will always exist because all humans are flawed. It's unfortunate, but that's just how life is. And there is still more good in the world than bad, so it's not good to generalize and make a bigger issue of these matters when it wasn't necessary to begin with.

As a woman, I have the right to vote in every election, to marry whenever and whomever I'd like, I can choose to have children, and how many, if I want any at all, and I can live anywhere I'd like. I can go to any college, work where I'd like, and I have all the rights as a man. I can be my own person and I don't need the title of "feminist" to do so. In other parts of the world, some cultures don't respect women at all. That's sad, yes. But before you criticize and say that we need to step in, remember, it's their culture and America has no right to police other nations on how they run their societies. I think men and women of all ethnicities, faiths, and sexualities are equal and should be treated so, but in other places, that's not the case. So instead of complaining about all the struggles we don't have, and really just makeup, why don't we appreciate our freedoms? Because if women really weren't equal to men in the U.S., would Hillary Clinton be a presidential candidate? Didn't think so.

The wage gap is an issue in some places, yes, I will agree to that. Everyone should be paid fairly based on their abilities. But all the reports claiming women don't get paid as much as men are wrong. In comparison to a male engineer and a female nurse, for example, the engineer would make more money based on his field. Now, there are plenty of women, my mother included, who make more money than her male co-workers. It just depends on the job. If you want more money, work hard, and negotiate with your employer for better compensation. It's not for the government to come in and dictate pay because that would be socialism, and America was based on having a small government (AP US History and AP US Government would tell you that.) No, it isn't fair if one gender gets paid better for the exact same work, but in many circumstances, that's not even the case. The wage gap is mostly determined by different fields and comparing them. Don't believe the media that every single job in this country is like that. And don't play the female victim card just so you can make some point about a made up issue that was made to pander to voters.

The "war on women" is a joke. I am a woman and I don't feel attacked at all. I have the right to get an abortion if I find myself pregnant and don't want the child. But abortion will never become illegal again so it's a non-issue. I don't see why so many women throw this argument into the mix when our reproductive rights are our own and no one is going to be able to take them away from us by law. So why make a bigger issue out of nothing? It's simply irritating. Get an abortion and no one will actually be able to stop you. Yes, there will always be people who try to stop abortions and protest the Roe v. Wade ruling, but by law, it's up to the woman. SO whatever your views are on abortion, you still have the right to do whatever you want with your body. Whether you "accidentally" get pregnant because of unprotected sex or in the unfortunate circumstances of rape, you have the choice. And no one will ever be able to take that away from you. So feminists, stop being rude and putting those bumper stickers on your cars that say "Keep your rosaries off my ovaries." That's annoying. By doing that, you're only making the issue bigger when it doesn't even exist. No devout religious person will ever agree with abortion, but don't be rude about their faith, just because some of you don't know how to have protected sex in 2016. (Side note: there's no need for abortions nowadays when birth control and condoms are a lot more accessible than back in 1950. So unless you have gotten raped or need one for a medical reason, there's no excuse for an "accidental" pregnancy and abortion anymore. Stop with the stupid excuses if you're not responsible enough to handle the consequences of sex.)

I am a strong woman who doesn't need the label of "feminist." I've never heard of a strong male describing himself as a "masculinist" and that also would cause issues among the feminist society because then men are the cause of inequality and a million other issues would come about with men labeling themselves as such. But it's somehow okay for women to do so? Just never men because they're men and that's not okay for them to blah blah blah because they're men. Someone explain how that's okay, but whatever.

Feminism in today's age isn't useful, it isn't pushing us forward, and it's actually keeping us back from uniting as a nation. Has anyone realized that feminism is really dividing us more and more with every single claim the feminist society brings forth? Has anyone realized that by claiming men hold too much power or that things aren't equal really causes more issues that don't exist in the first place? There is no "war on women" and if you truly believe there is, I feel sorry for you. I am so sorry that you feel the need to be a victim when you have an unbelievable amount of rights in this nation that other women on the other side of the world can only dream of having. Again, if there was such a strong inequality among the two genders, I really don't see how the (somehow) beloved (to some) Hillary would be running for the presidency as a woman! If gender inequality truly existed as much as feminists claimed it did, now wouldn't she be unable to run a campaign because biologically she is a female? Crazy.

So thank you, if you read all the way down. Thank you for letting me express my opinion, even if it's different than yours. Thank you for letting me use my first amendment right to speak my mind. And thank you for respecting my thoughts on the matter, without name-calling or telling me that I'm uneducated. I'm glad you took your time out to see another perspective and that you may not truly know what your cause is actually about.

This country has many beautiful freedoms for all of its citizens (the experience is what YOU do with it) and I hope you see that a little more clearly.

Cover Image Credit: telegraph.co.uk

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This Is How Your Same-Sex Marriage Affects Me As A Catholic Woman

I hear you over there, Bible Bob.
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It won't.

Wait, what?

I promise you did read that right. Not what you were expecting me to say, right? Who another person decides to marry will never in any way affect my own marriage whatsoever. (Unless they try to marry the person that I want to, then we might have a few problems.)

As a kid, I was raised, baptized, and confirmed into an old school Irish Catholic church in the middle of a small, midwestern town. Not exactly a place that most people would consider to be very liberal or open-minded. Despite this I was taught to love and accept others as a child, to not cast judgment because the only person fit to judge was God. I learned this from my Grandpa, a man whose love of others was only rivaled by his love of sweets and spoiling his grandkids.

While I learned this at an early age, not everyone else in my hometown — or even within my own church — seemed to get the memo. When same-sex marriage was finally legalized country-wide, I cried tears of joy for some of my closest friends who happen to be members of the LGBTQ community. I was happy while others I knew were disgusted and even enraged.

"That's not what it says in the bible! Marriage is between a man and a woman!"

"God made Adam and Eve for a reason! Man shall not lie with another man as he would a woman!"

"Homosexuality is a sin! It's bad enough that they're all going to hell, now we're letting them marry?"

Alright, Bible Bob, we get it, you don't agree with same-sex relationships. Honestly, that's not the issue. One of our civil liberties as United States citizens is the freedom of religion. If you believe your religion doesn't support homosexuality that's OK. What isn't OK is thinking that your religious beliefs should dictate others lives. What isn't OK is using your religion or your beliefs to take away rights from those who chose to live their life differently than you.

Some members of my church are still convinced that their marriage now means less because people are free to marry whoever they want to. Honestly, I wish I was kidding. Tell me again, Brenda how exactly do Steve and Jason's marriage affect yours and Tom's?

It doesn't. Really, it doesn't affect you at all. Unless Tom suddenly starts having an affair with Steve their marriage has zero effect on you. You never know Brenda, you and Jason might become best friends by the end of the divorce. (And in that case, Brenda and Tom both need to go to church considering the bible also teaches against adultery and divorce.)

I'll say it one more time for the people in the back; same-sex marriage does not affect you even if you or your religion does not support it. If you don't agree with same sex marriage then do not marry someone of the same sex. Really, it's a simple concept.

It amazes me that I still actually have to discuss this with some people in 2017. And it amazes me that people use God as a reason to hinder the lives of others. As a proud young Catholic woman, I wholeheartedly support the LGBTQ community with my entire being. My God taught me to not hold hate so close to my heart. He told me not to judge and to accept others with open arms. My God taught me to love and I hope yours teaches you the same.

Disclaimer - This article in no way is meant to be an insult to the bible or religion or the LGBTQ community.

Cover Image Credit: Sushiesque / Flickr

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Double Standards Are Plaguing Our Society

What and how are double standards hurting our society?
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Why is that when a female has many sexual partners she is considered a slut, but when a male does it he is celebrated as a king? Why is it when a male wears makeup or paints his nails his shunned by the world, but when a girl does it she looks bomb? How can the pope support ending the gender gap, but refuse to allow women to hold spiritual leadership roles? It’s because we live in a world filled with double standards.

What is a double standard? Merriam-Webster states it’s “a rule or principle that is unfairly applied in different ways to different people or groups.” We see in our society that there are many double standards between races, religions, sexualities, and genders.

Many double standards are hurting our country and even our world. Many people are blind to the double standards that plague our community especially if isn’t affecting them, while some just accept these as okay in our society, but they aren't okay. Here a few double standards that are seen in today's society.

Gender.

  • Women are paid less than men for doing the same exact job.
  • If a man cries he is considered weak, while it’s alright for a woman to do so.
  • When a male is sexually harassed by a woman he is lucky, while it happens to women it’s considered rape (I’m not denouncing rape that happens to women)
  • If a woman asserts any kind of dominance she’s a bitch, but if a guy does it he’s a leader.

Religion.

  • If someone of Muslim faith kills someone the headlines are “Muslim Terrorist Strikes Again!”, but they never announce if the killer was a Christian. They say he was a “lone wolf”
  • If a Christian teacher tried to make the class pray it would be okay, and millions would support them, but if a Muslim teacher tried that the world would go crazy.
  • the KKK (who are “Christians”) is okay, they can recruit through their website which isn’t blocked in any way and even endorsed our current president

Race.

  • If a black person does anything they seem suspicious, but when white people do it, it’s okay.
  • When NFL teams win big games their fans destroy cities, but if any peaceful protest happens it’s a riot and police decide to throw tear gas.
  • If a white person uses weed their considered a stoner, but if a black person does it they’re a criminal.

Sexuality.

  • if a straight couple does anything it’s normal. If a gay couple does it, it’s an abomination.
  • Straight couples can mistreat their own kids and it be okay, but if a gay couple wants to adopt a kid all hell breaks loose.

Weight.

  • If some bigger over eats their considered fat, and unhealthy, but if a thinner person over eats no one says a word.

Of course, there are so many other double standards that affect other groups of people, but just having these few is too many. We have to do something about this! If we allow one group of people to do something we must allow all other groups to do so as well. This must change to allow everyone to feel equal if we claim to be an equal opportunity country.

It isn't impossible to change these double standards as we have seen double standards in the past be changed. such as a male could be a doctor, but a women couldn't. Or even a white person holding a higher position in work and black person couldn't. Therefore, we see a change can happen, but only if we choose to make it happen.

Cover Image Credit: Ashley8053

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