When I Miss You This Christmas

"December 13th I have nothing done,"

When I see the perfect gift for you my son

"Knowing you are not here I struggle putting it back"

The shelf proving in my heart there is something I lack

The years seem longer as they come to an end

"with many a tear," or an understanding friend

"Remembering you is a struggle renewed"

Making the skies fade to a lowly hue

I am missing those "shopping sprees on Black Friday" to malls

All of those times we were singing Deck the Halls

"The tree, house and our special village together"

My only child I know I will miss you forever

When I miss you this Christmas looking toward your chair.

Confusion ensues: you are no longer there.

I may never know why you "lost the will to live

Now the angels have the best that we can give"

"Your hugs may be a physical absence"

Still I am grateful that "I feel your presence

For I know there is nowhere I could be

where you are not there beside me"

To write this piece, I reached out to those who have lost loved ones to mental illnesses. Everything in quotes is credited to one of those five amazing people with slight edits. I want this collaboration to represent an important message for those struggling. You are never alone.

This poem is dedicated to all of those struggling, those we have lost, the supporters, the fighters, and the loved ones. You are worth it- keep fighting. I will be right there fighting alongside you <3

If you are in a crisis, please call 1-800-273-8255

For help navigating the holidays after a loss, please visit

https://afsp.org/handling-special-occasions/