It's not exactly a secret that this generation's reputation is often associated with a sex-crazed hookup culture. However, a recent article from TIME explains that not only are millennials having less sex than past generations, but there's one hidden variable that gives us a clue as to why.
Yep, you guessed it. A lot of it has to do with our phones.
There are a number of reasons why I'm not that surprised.
For starters, face to face interaction has become less and less cherished across the board. Even though technology and the rise of social media platforms are meant for enhancing connection, we've still unintentionally built a barrier between ourselves and others through our devices. We do it up to the point where face to face social interactions start to induce more anxiety than usual because we don't have a home screen to hide behind.
Now let's add the bedroom to this scenario. Most people will probably agree that one of the first things we do as soon as we wake up and right before we go to bed is scroll through the feed on our phones for countless minutes. If you're spending the night with your partner on a recurring basis then being glued to your phone may take away some of the only free time you have with them after a busy day.
As a person whose top two love languages are personal touch and quality time, it's one of the BIGGEST pet peeves when a guy wakes up in the morning and gets so distracted by social media that he doesn't take the time to really delight in my existence. Especially because If I wake up in the morning feeling well rested then nine times out of ten I'm probably going to want to fuck first thing in the morning or at least cuddle in silence for a little while.
And that's only a small scenario compared to different ways people are using phones as an easier substitute for sex with another person. Why? Because the possibilities are endless. A person can get free porn, search for half-naked disproportionate models on Insta, and rely more on sex-related forums online for advice over experimenting with your partner. To some degree, scientific studies have shown that avid porn watchers can inadvertently condition their brains to have a stronger response to stimuli online rather than in person.
At the end of the day, it's understandable that phones can be distracting, but if it gets to the point where you're noticing that it's consuming your life then put it down. One thing that I encourage all couples to do is take the time to really cherish each other when you're around each other. Instead of grabbing your phone as soon as you're about to go to bed, give your partner a sensual massage with oil first or at the very least ask them how their day was. Have an open and honest conversation about how you want to feel. If you want to feel ravished then tell them. If you want to feel irresistible then let them know how they can make you feel that way.