They say your boss can't be your friend. They also say a boss can't be a funny friend. Those people haven't met Michael Scott, who's definitely one of the two. Some know him as the manager for the Dunder Mifflin Paper Company in Scranton, Pennsylvania but most know him as the "World's Best Boss" from the television mockumentary "The Office." He has faced many pressures at his job, including Staples, but one question hangs over his head: what if Michael Scott ran for president? It would be a landslide of laughter and liability without a doubt but here are some campaign trail points of reference from the office man himself.
1. Education is (and was) his main concern.
It wasn't a smart proposal when President Trump wanted to cut funds to the arts and educational television like PBS. Kids need learning opportunities as they develop. If it's one thing we know about Michael Scott, he is a man that gives, even when he can't give at all. Oh Scott's Tots, we hope you've graduated college, and Michael, we hope you learned that promises aren't always guarantees. You're heart was in the right place though.
2. He is culturally sensitive.
The only foreign place Michael has been to is Sandals, Jamaica but that doesn't stop him from getting to know other cultures. Sure, his Asian impression during The Dundies at Chili's was unwarranted but after the stereotypes roll over and finally play dead, Michael comes to you with open arms. That is, if he can remember to turn on his filter. Or bring markers.
3. He flip-flops because he cares.
Michael is a people-pleaser. He wants everyone to get along and for everyone to be happy. Michael has a lot of characters he's portrayed over the years to do just that (who could forget top-secret agent Michael Scarn?) Damn the torpedoes, he'll make you happy like a group of Jims and Pams. If he doesn't, he'll go down with his ship knowing that he gave it his best shot of many best shots.
4. He's financially responsibly risky.
Most of the president's books would end in Chapter 11, but Michael isn't so frugal, or an author. The expenses paid for all those office parties, the renovations to his condo, it all adds up for good times and hard times.
5. His strength is his weakness, which are most words.
Michael speaks English but it's a much older English. It's somewhere between narcotic and neanderthal. He always manages to get a word in edgewise, though it's rarely so wise. Words like "Mexicanity" and "perfecter" set him apart from the competition. Let's call his vocabulary a stream of unconsciousness.
6. His foreign relations are something else.
Anywhere he goes in the world, he can make himself feel at home. Unlike the president, Michael doesn't need a translator. His unnerving charm and tenacious clowning leaves nations wondering how he made it pass the primaries. He must picture himself against Toby traveling abroad, which means he's already ahead of the game. That game? Hockey.
7. He understands women.
This is a man who does not take love lightly. Vice President of Dunder Mifflin Jan Levinson, Pam's mom Helene Beesly, Carol Stills (Steve Carell's actual wife), the list of women he understands is short and tragic. He confuses and sometimes crosses that line to the heart. Could you call them affairs? Sure. Did he have to pay to keep them quiet? No, he was loud enough for the both of them. Michael Scott is a lover, not a fighter, unless he's fighting for love, than it's all's fair in love and war. Let's hope that Holly Flax is to Michael what Melania is to Donald: soup snakes.
8. He loves himself but loves to be loved more.
Confidence is like knowing half what you need to know, so the other half of being liked should come naturally. Michael works for your love. Is that a good thing? Maybe not all the time. Is it honest? Sometimes, but like all tragic heroes they have tragic flaws. Michael's tragic flaw is his love.
9. He shows anger in person, not on Twitter.
The pressures of being a regional manager of a paper company are something you can't put in to print. His incredible reserve (where does he find it?) has saved him from being fired somehow. Besides, Michael's tweets would occur much more frequently and be crazier, in a good way. Michael shows his true colors when the moment is (and feels) right. Speaking of colors.
10. He supports the LGBTQ community.
Michael goes to great lengths to accept people as they are. He'll walk a mile in your shoes, cradle babies, and kiss and come out of the closet for a gay man. He doesn't swing that way but nonetheless, he makes sure you can swing.
11. He takes credit where credit is due.
Remember when Michael thought the Scranton branch was closing, but didn't, and he claimed he saved the branch anyway? Well, Dwight was there too except he was more helpful than Mike Pence ever could be. It's moments like this where we need a manager as well as a professional salesman. Michael, through all the jokes and laughs, manages to close a sale like only a friendly boss can.
12. He's not a fan of the Man.
Toby is society or civilized authority that tries to bring Michael back to Earth but he can't stop the cow that is Michael from jumping over the Moon. He's an unconventional businessman that changes the basics to get in to people's business. Michael doesn't just makes sales, he makes memories.
13. His "show" is more popular than reality TV.
That's right, Michael doesn't have to fire anybody to make good TV. Although, when he does, it makes excellent TV. The point is, Michael is a powerhouse that never needed cameras or a documentary to prove it. Besides Walter Cronkite, he is the most trusted man in America. That's what she said too.
14. Michael Scott is a man of the people.
No one will forget this potential presidency. Not that it would never happen, it would happen, and it would have a lot of potential. Greater things are to come but to keep it all in perspective, Michael heeds his own inspiring words: "A woman shouldn't have to be hit by a car, to learn that she may have rabies. But that is where we are in America. And that does not sit right with me."
Being regional manager and being president aren't so different, but to get from the office to the Oval Office, Michael G. Scott needs your vote! Oh, what's his middle name you ask? "Greater." No, it's really "Gary" but "Greater" just sounds right. Make America greater again!