One of the most challenging things that a woman faces is being a woman. Our mothers, grandmothers, sisters, and other female figures in our lives (sometimes even male figures) condition us to believe that "being ladylike" and "acting like a woman", whatever that means, are the keys to success.
Historically speaking, the function of a woman was to take care of the house, take care of the family, and be a support system for her husband and children.
The problem with this whole lady like business is the fact that acting less so of a lady allegedly makes you less of a woman. This is such a problem because from my personal experience, I've been taught from a very young age that I have to act more feminine and more ladylike, and acting “more girly” is something that I haven't always liked doing.
Now if anyone knows me, I drop the F-bomb countless times a day, like to lie back on my bed with a leg bent and arm behind my head, and I don't always enjoy dressing up. Pants are ten times more comfortable than skirts or dresses, sneakers are better than heels, and sometimes (closer to almost always), no makeup is preferable to makeup.
Again, that does not make me or anyone else with similar traits less so of a woman.
Before I continue, I think that it’s important to address the distinction between being a woman and being a lady: the former is associated with being a female human being, and the latter is a state of behavior, just like being a man is different from being a gentleman.
The common traits that a woman is supposed to possess include gracefulness, sensitivity, dependence, and worst of all, weakness. Now don’t get me wrong, having these traits is never a bad thing. However, the problem with traits like these is how people (specifically the media) frequently use them against women: just because a woman is nurturing and emotional, she’s suddenly worse than a man. Just because one particular woman is not submissive or soft, she’s masculine.
Girls, women, female humans, it is so important that you recognize that just because you might not be a “lady” by societal or historical standards, you’re not any less of a woman. Being a woman is so much more than how well you can cook a meal, take care of someone, and how good your manners at the dinner table are. It’s so much more than how submissive you “should” be, how elegant and dainty you’re “supposed” to be, and how innocent you “need” to be. Being a woman is about being strong, powerful, and a role model in your own skin despite. To be a woman is to be successful, to be wise, to be learn-ed, to be strong.
What we as women need to start owning and being proud of is being a woman itself. We are so blessed to be living in a region of the world where our countries recognize the equality of men and women, and given the right to exercise it.
That being said, being a woman, in my opinion, is something that was never meant to be easy: you’re objectified constantly, judged for the clothes that you wear, and criticized for so many of your day-to-day decisions. But that is exactly why it is the responsibility of women to be women: be proud, be tough, be educated, be respected.
It’s invalid to judge an individual based on the type of genitalia they have. It is incorrect to judge someone for their decisions based on whether they have more estrogen or testosterone. It’s time for the world to realize that no matter if you’re a woman or a man, believe in one god or multiple, or where your love lies, we’re all designed to make the world a better place.
We may be different on the exterior, but on the interior, we’re all the same. We were put on this earth to make an impact, and despite our external differences, we’re all designed to do the same thing: progress.
