In a literary sense, compassion is a word that stems from the Latin root “co” meaning “together" and “passion” meaning a “strong and barely controllable emotion.” It is the feeling of sincere empathy towards another’s struggles, and a desire to alleviate them. While I have certainly always understood the definition of this word, I don’t think I every truly understood compassion until I came face to face with it on a warm summer day. It was a feeling that came over me like a cool spring shower, just a few drops at a time and slowly building in intensity until it climaxed in a complete downpour to then give way to an amazing sense of happiness that transcending beyond the surface of the everyday elements of daily life.
It all started on a crowded subway ride from downtown Chicago to Wrigleyville where I had planned to attend a Chicago Cubs game. I can remember standing shoulder to shoulder on the train, pressed against the wall of the train car as I grasped the support rail above me. The ride, like all subway rides, was quite shaky. I can remember looking at a woman standing in front of me, unable to grab the rail for support due to the crowded nature of the ride. As the subway would rattle through the city I could see her struggle to maintain her balance, not enough to be at risk of falling down, but surely enough to be uncomfortable. Here I was, standing on this train, and I began to feel a deep sympathy for this woman in front of me. After all, I was experiencing the same struggle as she was, yet I had the comfort of the hand rail to provide me stability. That feeling of sympathy was then overcome with a desire to help her in her struggle, as if something from deep within me was calling for me to aid this stranger in what seemed to be a relatively trivial moment of need. Throughout the rest of the rest of the train ride I did just that, extending a hand of support whenever she began to lose her balance. I got off the train and had begun to feel the drops of a stirring storm of compassion that would soon engulf me.
After exiting the train, my first desire was to alleviate my hunger after having spent the last several hours driving and riding trains. My friends and I went to a bar outside the stadium and sat down at a table to order food and drinks. After reviewing the menu, I decided what I really wanted was just a simple hamburger and french fries. We proceeded to place our order and shortly thereafter received our food. I began to eat the burger that arrived for me only to be confronted the with unexpected realization that what I was eating was not a hamburger, but in fact a vegetarian-type burger. I quickly grabbed the menu to take a second look at what I had ordered only to then realize that the description of the “garden burger” was not a listing of various toppings that would go on my burger, but rather the contents of the burger itself. In this moment of realization, I attempted to wave down the waitress, but was unable to draw her attention in the crowded bar. I had this overwhelming feeling that my struggle was not only of my own doing, but also one of no positive outcome - I would have to buy an additional entree and suffer the burden of an empty wallet, or go hungry and suffer the burden of an empty stomach. After contemplating my dilemma for several minutes, I got up from my seat and approached the waitress who was ringing in another order at the bar. At this point I had made the decision that I would simply pay for another entree and satisfy my hunger at the expense of what else that money may have been better spent on. But it was through an act of compassion by a waitress who I had never met before, and likely will never meet again, that I was able to get a new meal, free of charge, after explaining my situation. I came back to my seat and had this indescribable feeling of a connection with this woman. It was a feeling that comes from the unmotivated kindness and compassion of another person who was able to not only understand my struggles, but help me overcome them.
After finishing our meals, my friends and I proceeded to the game where, upon attempting to scan our tickets at the gates of the stadium, we discovered that we had purchased tickets for the game that was being played the following day. The ushers told us that we would be unable to use the tickets to attend that day’s game and further informed us that the section we wanted to sit in was sold out for the day. Here we were, after having traveled hours and already having spent money on tickets and food, faced with a feeling of despair that what we had set out to do was all for not. In a last ditch effort to salvage what seemed to be a wasted day, we proceeded to the main box office to see if anything could be done to get us into the the game and in the section we had hoped to sit in. It was in this moment of despair, that the compassion of yet another complete stranger allowed for our struggles to be understood and alleviated. Understanding of our circumstances, the manager at the box office was able to get us tickets to get into the game that were in even better seats than what we had originally intended to sit in.
In the end, it was not the train ride, the hamburger, or successfully attending the game that made that day so truly amazing. Surely, these occurrences will be just a few of many like them in my life and, quite frankly, I don’t even remember the score of the game as I sit here writing just hours later. No, what made this day amazing was the power of compassion between complete strangers to provide stability in times of shakiness, satiety in times of hunger, and joy in times which all hope seemed lost. It was through compassion that the struggles of that day were not only acknowledged, but also overcome in a way that simply would not have been possible if taken on single-handedly. What I learned that day was that while we all face a unique set of struggles as we move throughout life, it is through simple acts of compassion that we are able to help others and ourselves overcome the anguishes of life in order to derive a greater sense of meaning, connectedness, and happiness. Compassion: passion, together.
