I know what it's like to be at a crossroads of a life altering, life changing decision that could drastically change you but more importantly, relationships with people around you.

I am confused, I am pulled apart into many different directions and so far I don't know which piece to follow. My heart has been broken so much so that when I try to put it back together it becomes more tape and glue than authentic material.

I am at a crossroads. One of two directions could be chosen, both with drastically different outcomes. In this case, this is nothing a pro/con list can fix. It's something I have to choose on my own. It's something I need to make a decision about now.

As a part of this, I have come to understand that not everyone can be there for me in the way that I want them to be and I either have to be okay with that or be lonely. Being lonely may even be better.

I don't know what decision you may be dealing with. But in life we are faced with decisions that sometimes we don't want to make. These decisions may even remind us of what we've done in our past. We're faced with the truth of who we actually are.

Personally, with the decision I am faced with, I am thinking about one single question: Who am I and why am I here? That can be a loaded question, but it also can give answers that may give direction in pretty much every situation.

I have to be honest, I don't know the answer to that question. People can try and answer it for me and whatnot, but I legitimately cannot sit down and think about an honest answer for myself. I understand that others can give their own opinions on who they think I am, but they're not in my head like I am (if that even makes sense). No one can change me, I guess?

Maybe in this case, no answer is an answer.

When you're making a difficult decision yourself, decide where you want yourself to be. Is it a decision that changes the track you're on in a significant way? Is it a decision that will change your place in others' lives? Think about it.

With this word "decision", I'd be remiss if I didn't reference Grey's Anatomy just once. Meredith once said, "So do it. Decide. Is this the life you want to live? Is this the person you want to love? Is this the best you can be?...." (and so on and so forth and what have you).

Do it. Decide.

It's your choice whether or not to involve others in this decision that you're struggling with. It's your choice whether or not to tell anyone you even have to make the decision. Life is all about choices and I've been told that every choice comes with a consequence, positive or negative. Keep that in mind.

So, as confusing as it may be, all I can say is that you have to make sure this choice is for you. Don't worry about what others want or what others think. If you think it's for the best, do it.

I think maybe that's what I need to do. Maybe I need to make this decision in a way that reflects what I want instead of what others want for me. Maybe I need to just do "me". Maybe I can't let others in. But maybe I also need someone. Maybe I'm not worthy.

SO now I have to look at myself deeply and...

Breathe in. Breathe out.

And decide.