Dating in 2016 can honestly be scary as hell. There's so much uncertainty - "Should I text him?" "He liked my photo on Instagram, that's a good sign right?" "Her relationship status still says single." "We're just talking, we're not official." It's all enough to make you not want anything to do with dating at all.

This is the age of technology, as we all know. Millennials are so used to having everything at their fingertips, and having everything instantly, that not only do we expect relationships and real connections to blossom immediately - we actually turn to the internet to find them. Everything is easily accessible and instant online, and we expect love to be, too.

As a disclaimer, I know people for whom online dating has worked wonderfully. However, generally it is a superficial game that allows you to basically shop for a significant other. The truth is when you look to date online, or just start dating people before really getting to know them, you're basing your connection off looks and immediate impressions alone. Not only that, but you're going into it with the goal of creating a relationship of some kind, or at least viewing the person as someone you might have a relationship with soon, rather than someone to just have fun with and get to know.

The problem with this is that, when you view someone from the get-go as a potential partner, you're not only putting pressure on both of you, but you're also bound to act differently around the person, making sure you're giving off the impression you want so you come across as attractive to them.

On the other hand, when you meet someone randomly because life just brings them your way (rather than meeting them "on purpose" through online dating or a friend setting you up on a date or something), chances are you're not immediately thinking of a relationship happening between you. You naturally get to know them as a person, you're free to be yourself as long as you're not trying to impress them, and a strong, lasting connection is much more likely to arise than when you're consciously trying to create one.

Even more importantly, when you allow love to happen on it's own rather than trying to create it with people you don't know if you could have a real connection with, you're giving the person a chance as a person, not just a potential boyfriend or girlfriend; you see them as a person and a friend, not exclusively your significant other.

Lastly, I'd like to acknowledge that before romantic love must come self love. Taking care of yourself, and making sure you're happy with the person you are makes it so you don't need another person to do that for you. When you're content with yourself, and you love yourself, you'll be able to love someone else that much more strongly, and you'll be happy until love comes along on its own and makes you that much happier.

You won't be pressed to swipe left on hundreds of people until you can find that one that makes you swipe right. Rather, you'll meet all kinds of interesting people until you find the one that is your best friend first, brings out the best in you, and loves you for who you are.