Growing up, I thought life worked like a Hallmark movie. A small town girl moves to the big city and all her dreams come true. She traded in the cowboy boots for high heels, the ATV for a sleek sports car, and the quiet small town for the bustling big city. I always thought that's how my life would be. I'd get an apartment in a city, work in an office, and always be within walking distance of a Starbucks. I wanted that. Until, I got it.
Granted I didn't move to NYC or anything, but living in a dorm on a college campus in the middle of a city was quite a culture shock. I grew up in a town where everyone knew everyone, and I had a hard time remembering where extended family stopped and neighbors began. I adjusted to city life, but I didn't realize how badly I'd missed the country until I went home for a visit.
Nostalgia hit me like a ton of bricks. Dust in the rear view mirror, my dog, Banjo, running to meet me, the sounds of animals calmly grazing in the pasture, the smell of a bonfire, and the sounds of crickets instead of cars. This was home.
Of course, looking back, I spent most of my life trying to slip away from the country label. I listened to rock music, tried to speak without a southern accent, and avoided any type of country movie like the plague. I tried to be the theatre kid, the gamer, the classic rock fan. But these felt like labels, not who I really was.
Music played a big part in my life growing up. I remember listening as my dad pulled up songs by Alabama on the family computer so I could hear his favorite country band. I remember my mom playing country music throughout the house if things got too quiet. I remember singing along to Josh Turner and Tim McGraw in my grandma's car. It wasn't officially Christmas until we'd played some Alan Jackson Christmas music, and the first thing my dad did when I got my guitar was try to pluck out the opening chords to "I'll Fly Away." I got Keith Urban CDs for Christmas, and I still know every word to "Good Directions."
Country music refused to let me forget what my family knew all along, even if it took me years to figure it out: I will always be a country girl at heart.
