Three words that have been coveted over the course of time used to express the ultimate care and emotion you feel for another human have suddenly become a quick way to make someone feel special. When I watch movies from decades ago, this phrase is the pinnacle of one's relationship; it changes everything. Yet, when people say these words now, it seems they are thrown around prematurely and artificially.
I understand some couples progress faster than others, and when you meet the "one," you just know, but I am still a firm believer that you should avoid saying "I love you" until you are definite about your emotions and where you stand with the other person in the relationship. What I don't think many people realize is the physical and emotional connection we humans have with the idea of love. We crave this feeling, we dedicate years of our lives searching for it, and we are willing to put everything on the line in order to experience this crazy phenomenon, so when someone finally tells us they feel love for us, it is an overwhelming sensation of joy and accomplishment and acceptance. Thus, I do not think it is fair to say this phrase in such a casual and hollow fashion.
I love my family, I love my friends, I love my dog, and I love traveling. These are four things in my ever-changing chaotic life that I am positive I feel such a strong emotion towards that I can confidently say I love. I have been in love, or so my nineteen-year-old self-believes. Even writing this statement is scary for me because I am not someone who dives heart first into things. When you are so used to thinking with your head instead of your emotions, it makes it even harder to understand this beautiful concept. That is why when I say "I love you," I make sure I mean it.
If you are reading this and you are in a relationship or have been in one where you feel so strongly about the other person and really know them as a person, I think it is fair to say you love them. If you are using this statement to manipulate the dynamic between you and a significant other into being more serious in a shorter amount of time or feel you need to say these words in order to keep them close, just don't. One of the most painful feelings is having someone say they love you and not mean it. As the wise John Mayer says, "Love ain't a thing, love is a verb." If you value these three special words, you will show it, you won't just say it, because love isn't causal.
