The past few weeks have been a whirlwind of responsibilities, sadness, mixed feelings, and reduced self-esteem for one of my friends. He is severely overwhelmed with a bunch of responsibilities and a majority of them includes his family and college education. He doesn't reveal too much and keeps his thoughts to himself. But when he does, his robust words gives you goosebumps and a flood of tears come gushing out from your face. To make it even more worst, he ends up shedding an immense amount of tears as well. As his friend, I cannot express how much I feel for him and relate to him to quite an extent. I mean, come on! Most of us are college students and young adults who are constantly trying to climb the stairs to success. However, his story provides another angle of dimension entirely unique to most of us.
As a matter of fact, he is the sole breadwinner of his family which includes his parents and two younger siblings. His parents have aged drastically and cannot work anymore leading to their premature retirement. As the eldest son, it is entirely his responsibility to pay the bills and even his own tuition. Hearing his struggles and quest towards achieving success in life makes me wonder about the struggles of others and encourages me to think from his point of view. Being in his shoes is not an easy task and I applaud him for mastering the courage and stamina to endure all hardships. I met him a few days back and we spoke for a while about our lives and future career goals.
Although, I ended up interacting with another version of my friend. He was no longer the ebullient and down-to-earth person I used to know. Waves of endless responsibilities and educational failures changed him incredibly creating a new alter ego. Being one of his closest friends, I was immediately distressed by his massive transformation. As a result, I told him to pour out his heart and reveal all the turbulence that he has been going through the past few months.
The scenario is as follows: His mother has been terminally ill for quite some time and is unable to do anything like cooking meals for the family and cleaning the household. He has to take his mother to the hospital regularly for routine check-ups and take care of her alongside his studies. Next, his father is retired, spends his time reading the newspaper and hanging out with his friends. Apparently, his father is seldom seen inside the house. Fast forward to his siblings, they are still in high school and living in their world of fantasy and bedazzlement. Both siblings are completely unaware of what's going on with their mother and refrain from seeing or spending time with her.
That being said, the only savior to this chaotic environment is indeed my friend! Being extremely close to his parents especially his mother, he selflessly takes care of her and prays wholeheartedly for her speedy recovery. While partaking in this benevolent act, he also has to keep his eyes on his father and siblings. Since both his father and siblings are utterly unaware of what's going on in the world, he has to keep up with them and watch out for them. To add to that, balancing his educational duties alongside work as a student is really tough. Being a chemistry major, he is engulfed with a plethora of math and chemistry courses.
In order to emerge successful in these rigorous courses, he needs to be able to study in a peaceful environment with a relaxed state of mind. It turns out he is having a hard time balancing his multiple responsibilities and is starting to have a low self-esteem. After hearing him elaborately go through the various phases of his responsibilities, my levels of empathy towards others have started to increase. Essentially, it all boils down to the fact that we cannot let ourselves be challenged and controlled by other circumstances beyond our control. No obstacle is more powerful than our self-empowerment. It is up to us to never be too hard on ourselves and keep in mind that there is always light at the end of the tunnel.
P.S. The reason why I have kept my friend's name anonymous this whole time is because he told me so and that he wants everyone to learn from him by hearing his soul-wrenching story. His story is one that should serve as the torchbearer towards limitless ambitions and encourage everyone to never falter amidst a turbulent catastrophe.
