Dear Internet,
For the first time, I wrote an article that a lot of people (more or less politely) disagreed with me on. I’m not going to deny that there was a moment that I agreed with what I wrote, because obviously I wrote it, so I had to have thought what I was writing was right. But it was written based on fear, and I let my fears get to me. People react out fear, and mine just happened to be a written, public reaction. Looking back, I shouldn’t have let fear get the best of me, but things like this happen to people, and I’m guilty as charged. I’m not going to apologize for being a human who made a mistake.
I don’t know what everyone said about what I wrote because I can’t see individual shares, but I’m grateful for those who politely disagreed with me by commenting on my story because it helped me understand where they were coming from and how I was wrong.
As a writer, this experience has shown me that this could be the first of many times people could disagree with something I say. There are always going to be people who disagree with you, no matter if you speak of popular or unpopular thought. The challenge is realizing that sometimes we say things we shouldn’t have, that there will people who will always react negatively, and knowing when to admit that you’ve made a mistake in order to learn from it and move on.
Like any article with some sort of strong opinion, people are going to call you out for what you say.
The content of this “letter” isn’t about how I wrote something in an unpopular viewpoint and realizing I no longer agreed with what I wrote because it was wrong. It’s about how the rest of the world handles seeing any person’s unpopular thought. Because after writing something with an unpopular viewpoint, it opened my eyes to how the rest of the world views those who have a different opinion than them.
I’ve read plenty of Odyssey articles with some seriously hateful comments below, in complete disbelief that we can be so rude to our peers. Even though I’ve read negative comments in the past on other writer’s stories, I’ve never given it much thought because it wasn’t something that had happened to me personally.
(Everything I’m about to say below is of general statements about hurtful comments I have seen or heard about, with only the quoted comment a direct comment I personally have received.)
We seem to think in 2016 that we are protected from others with a screen. Anything can become viral quickly and one person’s opinion can suddenly have the whole Internet hating and sending death threats to a person they know absolutely nothing about.
And for the record, issuing death threats to people is as low as you can go. If you think that the world would be better off with someone dead, then shame on you.
But words are words, no matter what platform they are on, and there are some people who think that tweeting or commenting rude or hurtful things doesn’t hold as much weight as saying them in person.
There are two questions I have for these people.
If your mother or father were looking over your shoulder as you were about to comment something rude, hurtful or threatening, would you and could you still say it?
And second, why say these things to other people?
Why call them names? Why treat them like they are less of a person or second rate because their opinion doesn’t align with yours?
Time after time people attack others verbally and physically because of their opinions and beliefs. We’ve had times where current unpopular opinion was once the popular opinion and vice versa.
How would you feel if you got the same treatment after saying something unpopular?
Saying, “You are the reason our future has no hope” certainly makes me believe that our future has no hope, not because of those who share their opinions, but that there’s no hope for those who can’t handle differences in others.
What kind of people are we, if we demand to be treated with respect in real life but show no respect for others online?
I’m not saying we need to accept what others believe, because we don’t have to. But there is absolutely no reason to call people names, belittle them, threaten them and dehumanize them because you don’t see eye to eye on something.
It gets you no where by doing any of those things. And your comments could become more viral than that of the opinion you were criticizing, putting you under the microscope for your words.
As a student journalist, I know that there will be people who disagree with what journalists and writers say, but we are supposed to just toughen up and move on to the next story. We have feelings though. While we may be used to people disagreeing with us, hateful, harmful, dangerous speech is never appropriate and can bother us, because we are more than just a name on a screen, we are people too.
Living in a society that allows for those to speak their mind, no matter the opinion, can allow for healthy debates and learning experiences. There’s nothing wrong with disagreeing with an idea, but there’s no reason to take it out on the person.
Those who participate in slamming others online don’t want to admit or see who they really are, bullies.
Laugh all you want at that word, but bullying has taken many forms over the decades and has adapted to changing environments.
We’ve had physical bullying, and as a victim of physical bullying, I can tell you it’s not a myth or something only seen on TV, it’s very real, and it does hurts physically and emotionally. Then we went to verbal bullying, the “harmless” gossip and name-calling that plagued our generation’s middle school years, and probably is still around today. We are currently in the online bullying phase. And it’s the most dangerous yet. Anyone can be a bully now, without thinking they’re truly hurting anyone or doing anything wrong. And there’s no one to tell to have them punished for their words, because their hurtful words are protected just as much as the unpopular opinions are.
We shouldn’t care what these random strangers say or think about our articles, posts, tweets and ourselves, but yet we do. We’ve made the Internet so personal, as if everyone is right there and your friend, that any one wrong move and suddenly it seems like the world hates you.
I know my “letter” isn’t going to change the Internet. Why would it?
It’s just a friendly reminder to anyone who’s ever said anything bad about anyone on the Internet, including myself. Words can hurt. Even if the receiving end won’t admit it. At the end of the day, those words you post, a real person sees, a real person feels. Don’t let a screen fool you into thinking people can’t be hurt.
Respectfully yours,
Emily
