The summer after my senior year I was concerned about keeping in touch with my best friends from high school.

We were never people that used our group chats all the time, and our snap group is pretty inactive. I was the first to leave in August, so everyone came to my house the night before I moved in. We talked about what going to school would be like and how we'd do our best to all stay in touch.

As the mom friend of the group, I always assumed that I would be the one who was constantly reaching out to everyone and trying to get everyone on Houseparty. But as the days turned into weeks and the weeks to months I realized that I was the one who had to be reached out to. I became the one who would forget to text back or who would always say they would call but never did. I never expected things to play out like this, but life happens and balancing two worlds becomes increasingly difficult.

What I hope you all realize is that me leaving your Snapchats open or not texting the group chat doesn't mean that I don't think about you all every day. I can't tell you how many times I'll be in class and I almost lean over to tell you something funny only to realize we haven't been in class together for more than five months.

I hear people talking and I'm convinced it's you, but when I look up it's just another stranger, and I'm immediately disappointed. I constantly remember our inside jokes and sometimes I say something only you guys would understand and I wonder why no one gets it. So please don't think that just because we don't talk all of the time you aren't always on my mind.

Now I don't want you to see this and worry that I'm just miserably nostalgic 24/7.

There is a reason I'm never around. I have found an amazing home here. I've met so many amazing people (None of them will ever replace you, don't worry), and joined a ton of clubs. College has been everything we all dreamed it would be, and I hope you're having an even better time than I am. I hope you have found the people that will stay up all night to talk and I hope you already feel like you've known them forever.

I hope our morning parking lot conversations feel like a life time ago, but I hope you miss them as much as I do.

I count down the days until we get to see each other again. I know it'll be different. We aren't coming home as the same people who left a few months ago. I can't wait to hear all about the crazy things you've done and the friends you've done them with. I can't wait to be back home watching old Disney movies and arguing about which one is the best.

But until then, please know that I'm always thinking about you and I love you all more than words can possibly express. See you soon.