When my mom signed me up for pee-wee softball, I was forced to go to my first practice. From the moment I touched the softball, I knew this was going to be the sport I fall in love with. At 6 years old, I would come home from kindergarten and begged my dad to play catch with me. I loved throwing the ball, catching “puff-balls”, and batting. My dad knew I was going to go far with softball because I was committed so much into the sport. I grew up playing in summer leagues and town leagues. I spent so much of my free time playing softball. When I entered high school, I knew I wanted to try out for the softball team. After the try outs, I was so excited when I found out I made the team, and I couldn’t wait to get out of classrooms to be on the field. I would play for hours without getting bored or tired. Little did I know, my love for softball changed forever after I joined the team.
Dear Coach,
Did you think I was just another girl that wanted to try a new sport? Did you know I spent almost my whole life playing softball, and truly loved softball? Did you know I overheard you, telling another coach I can’t play softball because I can’t hear? I’m sure you didn’t know. When you pulled me out of practice to go sit on the bench because I didn’t simply catch a ball, I sat there punishing and telling myself I need to do focus better. Looking back, why did you pull me out instead of letting me know people makes mistakes. When I didn’t hear someone shouting to throw to first base instead of second base, I overheard you telling another coach “she isn’t good enough because she can’t hear.” I didn’t hear because my hearing device battery died while playing outfield, but I still wanted to stay in the game. When I didn’t catch the puff ball in my glove, you screamed at me and made me run. I told myself I’m sorry for not catching the ball, I actually avoided it because my hand was so black and blue, and so swollen I couldn’t even bend my fingers from practicing to meet your expectations. That how much I loved softball.
By time my sophomore year in high school came around, I would go cry before practice because I didn’t want to play softball. I was scared of getting embarrassed, yelled at, or even just picking up the ball without getting judged. After that season ended, I hated softball. I never wanted to touch a bat, gloves, or even a softball ever again. I didn’t touch a softball for a year after I quitted the team.
One day, my friend wanted to practice some softball and needed a catching partner so I said I would help out. The moment I picked up that softball, all the bad memories came back but I reminded myself you are not here. I actually reminded myself I used to be a good player before you came along. My friend and I actually played catch until the sun went down, and I felt happy again. I don’t love the sport anymore, but I am slowly liking it again. You did take the love I had for softball, but you didn’t take the softball from me.
From, The Girl Who Once Loved This Sport.
P.S. the foul ball that you got hit by me wasn’t on accident.
