"We live in deeds, not years; in thoughts, not breaths;
In feelings, not in figures on a dial.
We should count time by heart-throbs."
Philip James Bailey, 1839
"We should count time by heart-throbs." I think we all know this, but I don't think many, if any, of us do this. We live such busy lives that it seems that we let those moments pass by and never even give them a second thought until they're gone. This past weekend, I decided to just slow down and enjoy something that I knew would never, ever happen again.
My children are 22 months apart, but they are only one grade apart. That means that, right now and for the next two years, they are both in college at the same time. My son plays baseball at Lee University in Cleveland, Tennessee. My daughter goes to the University of West Georgia in Carrollton, Georgia. This past weekend, Lee played at West Georgia in a three game baseball series. Now, Lee and West Georgia are in the same conference and they play each year, but this year was the first, and as it turns out only, year they'd play each other there while my kids were enrolled in both of those schools. To me, that's really cool. Since they are both off at school, I don't see them nearly as much as I'd like and when I do, I don't usually get to see them together. But this past weekend, well...I got to, and it was so special. I got to watch my son play, and I got to watch my daughter watch him play. Now, I've seen this hundreds, maybe even thousands, of times before, but never like this. Add into the mix that Lyndsay is transferring from West Georgia, and this was something that would never happen again.
Maybe it's no big deal to most, but it was a big deal to me. When your kids leave home and you get to see them both in the same weekend, it's special. I was aware of this and, for maybe one of the few times in my life, just appreciated the moment.
And that's what got me to thinking.
I can't speak for anyone but me, but for much of my life, I've just been checking off boxes. Graduate high school, check. Get a baseball scholarship, check. Graduate college, check.
You get the idea.
But those are MAJOR check marks. What about the ordinary check marks? Aren't those what life's really about?
If you're a parent, you're going to feel this one more than those that aren't parents. Remember the very last time that you fed your child before he/she started doing it him/herself? What about that last bath you gave them? What about the last time you picked them up? Or the last time they woke you up in the middle of the night and wanted to get in bed with you because it made them feel safe?
No? You probably don't remember the last time because, well, you didn't know it was the last time.
And that's the problem with those simple things. They are such a part of our routine...such a part of just everyday life...that we take them for granted. We go through our day just checking off those tasks.
Until they are gone.
Think about this: I'm sure each of you have your morning routine and your morning drive. Did you notice anything unusual on your drive today? Perhaps...because it was unusual. But did you notice the things that are always there? Most of us can't take time for that stuff. We are too busy driving, our thoughts miles away or on the things we have to do, listening to the radio...whatever.
Check. Check. Check.
We accomplish our tasks and then we move on.
They are just ordinary check marks. But our life is made up of mostly ordinary check marks. We are watching our lives pass us by and not taking time to appreciate the ordinary.
Or maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm the only one who fails to notice and appreciate those simple things much of the time. I spend a lot of time wishing for some future event to get here. A ball game. A concert. A holiday. But what about today and all of the people and things I'l encounter? Ahh...I'll get that again tomorrow.
Or will I?
It's just something to think about. I love the quote that I used at the beginning of this blog, and I agree that we should count time by heart-throbs. I just think that maybe we need to find more heart-throbbing moments. More things to make us appreciate the ordinary.
In closing, I'm attaching a video of a toddler waving bye to people in a mall in Boston. Look at the smiles on the people's faces when they notice her. It's just a toddler waving. They could have not noticed or ignored her. Some did. But almost all of them saw her, smiled and even waved back. Look for moments like these today. Look for the extraordinary in the ordinary. Stop checking off ordinary check marks.
Check it out:
