“Well you’re going to Hell.”

“What are you going to do when you don’t go to Heaven?”

“You’re literally condemned to Hell for that.”

Ever since my freshman year of high school, I was told I was going to hell. I didn’t cry when I was supposed to, I didn’t pray with the others, I didn’t follow religious norms in my hometown. I was Buddhist. I didn’t know I would follow an Eastern religion, but come junior year, I realized Buddhism spoke to my heart in a way Christianity couldn’t.

I was raised Catholic, like many people around my hometown, let alone the Midwest and United States as a whole, but I never really felt at peace with myself and the faith. My Sunday-School teachers told conflicting stories about how anything from homosexual tendencies to other religious practices to even attending another religion’s mass or wedding would send me straight to Hell. It may have been some sort of fear tactic they were trying to instill, or maybe it was just the way of the church, but I never understood how people could “be made in God’s image,” yet be condemned to burn in Hell for all eternity if they break some sort of religious pact.

I’m not saying Catholicism or Christianity is wrong in any way, but just because I’m not Christian doesn’t mean you can call me less of a person. You can’t say I’m going to a certain “Hell” that I frankly don’t believe in. You can’t tell me I’m less spiritual or holy because of my faith, because I can tell you that I am fairly spiritual and the practice of mindfulness and meditation are two things I think of every single day. I may not know each of Buddha’s teachings, but I am in love with my faith the same way you might be with yours. I think religion is beautiful and people should be free to believe what they want without outside forces telling them what is right and wrong. Morality is more than a specific religious belief. It’s common courtesy. I can’t think of one atheist who killed a mass number of people because they thought they were the next prophet, but Charles Manson, among others did believe they were the next big thing in religion. Morality and religion are interconnected, but also completely separate. Don’t tell me I have less mortality because I’m not a Christian.

I don’t believe in the “hell” you’re sending me to, but I do believe in karma. Hell, you don’t even have to be religious to believe in karma. I believe in actual soul mates and I may romanticize this fact, but that doesn’t give you a right to tell me I’m wrong. I believe in a lot of things, Buddhist or not, and that doesn’t mean my opinion is right or wrong. I can’t tell you what the true religion is, but you condemning me to Hell because I don’t believe one Christian denomination is better than the next doesn’t help you in converting me back to Christianity. Honestly, I’m pretty firm in my own beliefs and if you want to judge me for it, fine, but nothing even matters until that higher power, whether fate, gods, God, or spiritual anomaly judges me after death, if there really is anything at all.

I’m not saying I’m a polytheist or atheist or monotheist or agnostic and I’m not telling you that any of these beliefs are right or wrong. I know I’ll receive backlash from admitting my religion, but I’ve been receiving condemnation for years now, so hit me with your best shot.