Dear girl who is dating a piece of shit,

I don't have a lot of experience with love. Really, I don't have any. So I assume you're wondering how I can decide whether or not I am qualified to tell you all about signs that your boyfriend or whoever is, in fact, a piece of shit. Although I may not have a degree in the applied science of love, I do have a self-assigned license in recognizing someone who doesn't care about you from a mile away. I only have a few pieces of advice for you, but, as they say, quality over quantity.

1. Listen to what he says when he's angry.

He's going to have excuses lined up and ready to use. He was drunk. He was on drugs. He wasn't thinking clearly. He was just messing around. He'll repeat that he didn't mean it a million and one times. Wish that he didn't, but forgive him anyway.

2. See how stress changes him.

Stress can get the best of all of us, and we all handle it differently. It's important to watch his body language and how he treats you when he tells you about a bad day at work or about how he has a lot on his plate right now. Let him take it out on you. Wish that he didn't, but forgive him anyway.

3. Discover his addictions.

Watch to see if he prioritizes said addictions over you. Halfway convince yourself that you can save him, but realize that he won't change if he doesn't put you first now. Wish that he did. Forgive him anyway.

4. Learn to love him in bits and pieces.

Realize somewhere down the line that your pieces don't fit with his the way you thought they would. Let him sand your corners down to make you fit. Allow his to take away your sharp thinking. Wish that he didn't feel like he needed to. Forgive him anyway.

5. Allow him to fill you with sadness.

Learn to destroy yourself, but wish that you didn't. Stay with him for longer than you should. Ignore your friends when they tell you he's no good. Allow him to change you. Let him fill you with hate and years later refuse to break down because you "don't want to be that person anymore." Realize you are, but it's okay. Realize it's okay to have allowed someone to treat you that way, but learn not to let it happen again. Come to term with your past, but do not relive it. Realize that, yes, he treated you with the littlest amount of respect, but forgive yourself anyway.

One of the best feelings in the world is forgiving yourself and not being sad over something you thought you would be sad over forever. Something you thought you'd be sad about forever. Listen to me when I tell you that you cant find love in the place you lost it.