I am proudly an introvert. It’s a label that -- no matter how many times I explain -- never seems to be clear, and almost always carries a negative connotation. As I was going through sorority recruitment, girls asked me to talk a little bit about myself. Oftentimes I’d mention that because I’m an introvert, I don’t mind my more privatized dorm. I found it fascinating how girls would laugh and assure me that I was doing just fine, as if to say (and sometimes literally saying), “You’re not an introvert, don’t worry.” But I wasn’t insulting myself, and replacing someone’s label with “extrovert” rather than “introvert” is not a compliment.
Introversion is so often linked to awkwardness, shyness, isolation, and discomfort. People hear the word introvert and think of the kid playing at recess by them self, or the person without a date to the dance. And if that’s what you had in mind before reading this article, that’s ok- I’m not mad at you. Just keep an open mind.
A great way to tell whether you’re introverted or extroverted, is to consider what would “re-charge your batteries” after an extremely stressful week. Or maybe what kind of night you’d need to have in order to think to yourself, I’m ready for the busy week ahead.
If you genuinely prefer to eat a snack, drink an iced coffee, and catch up on your favorite Netflix series -- chances are that you’re on the more introverted side of things. If you need a wild night out to let off some steam, that indicates extraversion. Similar to how wanting to stay in doesn’t make you “weird” -- loving the wild nights doesn’t make you an alcoholic or anything drastic like that, but it does indicate that you feed off peoples’ energy. A busy night filled with conversation and crowdedness excited you -- and that excitement is what recharges you.
Like anything, this is a spectrum. For me, my introversion means that after a week of recruitment, I went back to my dorm and the idea of going out was unfathomable. Introverts tend to really enjoy deep conversation with less people. So, a week of artificial, repetitive conversation with hundreds of girls was one of the most draining experiences of my life. I knew that I had some serious Netflix binging and iced coffee-drinking to catch up on. But I couldn’t do that every night.
Sometimes it might seem like the “cool” thing is to go out each night of every weekend, or to attend all three days of a music festival. In our society, it’s cooler to be extroverted. But I go out, and I go to music festivals…just in proportion to the nights I spend alone, or in small groups which are what personally re-charge my batteries. Being an introvert is a characteristic similar to the style of your hair or the color of your eyes. Be proud of who you are, and what you enjoy doing. Embrace your introversion with devotion and pride.
“Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you're supposed to. Stay home on New Year's Eve if that's what makes you happy. Skip the committee meeting. Cross the street to avoid making aimless chitchat with random acquaintances. Read. Cook. Run. Write a story.” – Susan Cain
