Having intentional friends is something that has become very important to me. To be honest, it wasn't until recently that a close friend of mine used the word, intentional, to describe our friendship. And, up until she had used that word, I never realized the impact of having that aspect in a friendship.

Like most kids, my parents taught me the value of friendship at a young age. I remember my mom and dad explaining the importance of the golden rule, and that friendship is a two-way street. They also taught me to distinguish the friendships that were real and the ones that were fake.

While I still value the lessons that I was taught as a child, I have realized that friendship is much more than what I had originally thought.

A few months ago, my sweet friend told me, "Jess, our friendship is so intentional."

It was then that I learned (yes, at almost 21 years old) what I now consider to be the most important aspect of friendship.

When the word "intentional" was used, I automatically agreed with her. I thought to myself "Heck yeah! She is right, we are always looking out for each other." But, as I took a step back and let her words truly sink in, I began to evaluate what intentional actually meant. I soon found myself unveiling its true meaning and realized that this word means much more than I had once thought.

Intentional friendships are unforced.

No matter how big or small, each gesture is made is because of the immense care that each person has for the other. They are real, and what may look like a simple "good luck" or "have a great day" text, has true meaning behind it. Communication and time spent together are not due to an established routine or obligation; it is due to genuine regard for the other person.

Intentional friendships are devoting. These friendships help to seek out the fullest potential of both people and allow for tremendous personal growth. Both people strive to challenge each other and put quality time and effort into doing so. Each person is able to see the qualities that the other is not able to see in herself, and holds the other accountable when needed.

Intentional friendships are comforting. This is the type of friendship where you can be vulnerable and express true feelings towards one another. Whether these are deep-rooted insecurities, fears, or simply raw emotions, you will be able to openly share these feelings without judgment. These friendships establish an environment where both people feel safe and at ease with each other.

Intentional friendships are invaluable. They are something that must be cherished and not taken for granted. These are the friendships that will be present throughout life's highs and lows, and everything in between. You will become a part of each other and will soon forget what life was like without the other person in it.

I encourage everyone to take a step back and think about the friendships that you have in your life. Ask yourself if the people close to you express the qualities of an intentional friend. 

If they do, you are lucky. Make sure to hold on tight to these relationships, and acknowledge the significance and value that they have on your life. Also, be sure to thank them for being there for you, and remind them how loved and appreciated they are.

If you don't have this type of friendship in your life right now, that's okay! It is never too late to find them. It has taken me almost 21 years to find mine, but I have never been happier. I have learned to let go of the friendships that did not exemplify these qualities, and devote all of my energy to the ones that have.

Focusing on these true and intentional friendships has been rewarding. These friendships have helped shape the person that I am and continue to inspire me each day. I look up to these women constantly and (as cliché as this sounds) have no idea where I'd be without them. In moments where I have felt lost and out of place, they are always there to reflect life back to me and show me where I belong.

To all of my besties, thank you! You all are the epitome of intentional friends, and I am forever grateful each of you.