This article recently came to my attention and as I read it I could feel my stomach drop. As someone who lives with mental illness, I caught myself thinking, “who on earth could possibly write such a demeaning article?” I read it a few times more over the following days and realized I could not let this go and that I needed to say something.

I have struggled with these issues for around seven + years, and I was not able to see a doctor until the beginning of this year. Did the doctor telling me what I already knew change anything? No. I was depressed before I had someone program it into the computer and link it to my online health records, and I am depressed today. The main point of the article I am standing up against is that you shouldn’t reach out to friends and family if you think you have a mental illness. Let me tell you: no one would choose this life, and no one would wish this on anyone else. During those seven + years, if I hadn’t been honest about my concerns and if I hadn’t “self-diagnosed” then I would definitely not be where I am today.

The author makes a few points and truly, there are only two that are valid. Yes, you should definitely seek professional help if you are feeling as though you might be suffering from a mental illness, and, yes, sometimes anxiety and depression are symptoms of different mental illnesses. However, with the wide variety of anxieties and depressive disorders, who’s to say what a “normal” thought is? Is it being unable to tolerate distress, trying to escape or numb yourself however you can? Is it hurting yourself because you feel ashamed of the feelings and you need to experience something physical? Is it being unable to hang out with lifelong friends because you’re exhausted and the thought makes you sick? Or maybe it’s when you can’t bear to look in the mirror without crying or when you have a panic attack at the thought of being around other people… Except none of this is average or, as the author puts it, “normal.” Thoughts and feelings like these are destructive and are signs of extremely serious emotional distress that should be dealt with as soon as possible. There is such a wide array of depression that you can’t tell someone to shut up about it. There are types that harp over you for years, and some that are only situational.

The people reaching out for help on the internet aren’t the ones who make us feel crazy, it is people like the author who is trying to dictate what’s normal, what’s real, how mental illness should be dealt with who make us feel crazy. Some people are unable to see doctors, some people only feel comfortable sharing on the internet; why is that a problem? If anything, it breaks my heart to see so many teenagers and young adults going through what I have experienced and feeling what I have felt. My experience is not everyone’s, but I can certainly empathize with those who reach out online and those who tell their friends they think they might be depressed. Other people suffering in no way affects how I view the validity of my own troubles. Medication is not always needed to treat these disorders as they manifest in so many different ways. Counseling helps for some, medication other, and a combination of even more. Do I feel “crazy” for seeking treatment? Not at all. How can someone reaching out for help make me feel dramatic or as if I’m faking it? My anxiety does that to me, not the people who think they may have depression or anxiety. Yes, maybe these people have rewritten what it means to be depressed or have anxiety, but so does EVERY other person who experiences these troubles. Why? Because anxiety and depression are unique to every single individual. No one has had the exact same life experiences as another, along with the possible biological factors at play to make these illnesses show themselves. In what way does someone using a hashtag, to reach out to others, about depression or anxiety make other illnesses seem worse or crazier? There is no correlation between #depressed and someone thinking that schizophrenia is inherently crazier than depression or anxiety. I truly do not comprehend how resources and support have been stolen, especially is the author is advising those concerned to seek treatment. Mental illness is not a competition, we don’t fight over who gets what, we try to help each other and reach out.

I have to say a few things that shouldn’t have to be said. If you are suffering from mental illness in any form (or think that you might be) you are NOT crazy, less of a person, or broken. If you aren’t currently receiving treatment, go and see someone, utilize the resources available to you. Maybe you can’t see a doctor, and that’s okay, so long as you are trying to help yourself and you have a support system. Sometimes the internet can be wonderful and the community can be extremely loving, other times it can be quite angry like the article I felt the need to respond to. If you go to USF there are free and affordable resources available to you including counseling and psychiatric help. There are hotlines you can call, such as 1-800-SUICIDE, and there are online crisis chats you can utilize when you don’t have anyone to talk to and you’re feeling down.

Please remember this: there is no shame in trying to get help or trying to feel better, even if you use the internet as your outlet. Don’t forget that you aren’t alone in this fight. Definitely don’t let people tell you in 500 words or less that your struggle isn’t as valid as the struggle of the diagnosed.

Mental illness has affected me in many ways, and if you feel as though you don’t have anyone to reach out to, I’m here, I’ll listen.