Emotional intelligence is that ability to be aware and manage your own emotions and others emotions. Emotional intelligence can be broken up into four sections: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and social management. Emotional intelligence is also not fully genetic, and is often based on your mental state, experiences, environment, and how you grew up.

Not everyone is equally good in all the sections; people can have different strengths and weaknesses. Unlike your IQ, your emotional intelligence can improve if you work towards it.

Self-awareness is the ability to know your own emotions and feelings. People with this strength know exactly how they feel in any situation. Even those who are mostly skilled with self awareness still face uncertainty and mixed emotions though. Some feelings are harder to understand than others.

These people can easily explain what caused them to feel this way, and what the feeling is. An example is that, Karen told Linda that her project turned out bad. Right away, Linda realizes that she feels angry at Karen. A person with low self awareness may feel uncertain about how they feel toward Karen.

Self-management is the ability to control how you feel inside. These people can feel furious at a person, but know how to calm their temper. This should not be confused with bottling in their emotions. A person who is good at self managing can still cry when sad. It’s the ability of being able to not let emotions get in the way of living your life. It’s okay to experience negative emotions, but these people can properly move on. An example can be that, Linda is angry at Karen but instead of yelling at Karen, Linda calms herself down.

Social-awareness is very different from self awareness. These people may not understand their own emotions, but they are aware of others. Even if a person tried to hide how they feel, people with high social awareness can detect how others are feeling. For example, Karen tells Linda that her project needs improvement. Linda can tell that Karen is angry at her. Linda may not realize how she is feeling, but knows exactly how Karen is feeling, and right about those feelings. Thinking how someone feels is not the same as knowing how someone truly feels. You can assume, but understand one’s feelings is the true skill of social awareness.

Social-management is the ability to help others control those feelings. Have you ever had a friend panic in front of you, and you tried to calm them down? That is using social management! Not everyone needs the same kinds of support for certain emotions. People with high social management can help others control their own feelings.

For example, Karen angrily screams at Linda for her bad project but Linda helps calm Karen down. This can also be the ability to talk to others about how others are feeling, and knowing what to do with that informations you are given.

Different skills people with high emotional intelligence has.

As you have read, emotional intelligence has many different areas that you can be strong or weak in. But, you have the ability to change your emotional intelligence.

The first step is being able to know where your weakness is, and understand why it’s your weakness. Reflecting on your own emotions and asking others for their perspective is the first step. Be observant and take pauses to better listen to others. This can also help you understand yourself. Also, keep track of what helps you and others control your own or their emotions.

Ask yourself why you or others feel a certain way in a situation. Taking criticism in your mistakes is a great way to learn from situations. Simply practice these skills in order to improve.

Finally, remember that you can not tell people how they should feel in a situation. Emotional intelligence is not just for negative emotions. It is an important skill for positive emotions. Without strong emotional intelligence, you can struggle to handle feeling positive.

Emotional intelligence helps others learn how to cope with life and enjoy it to the fullest. Thus, emotional intelligence is one of the most beneficial skills one can have.