This Year I'm Dating Myself
Start writing a post
Relationships

This Year I'm Dating Myself

Swearing off relationships to work on myself

542
This Year I'm Dating Myself
Carly Marmen

This New Year's I was angry. I was mad that once again I was spending another holiday alone. 2016 was a roller coaster of a year. There were incredible highs and lows. So many of my best friends got engaged and are cruising into their happily ever afters and I am thrilled to be on the marriage journey with them. I fell in love and had to push those feelings aside to save a friendship. I thought I met "the one." This year was full of adventures and new beginnings, yet I can't seem to get past the fact that once again I enter a new year alone.

My outward attitude will tell you that I am not interested in dating. I rarely verbally complain about my singleness, but deep down things are different. I long to be loved by someone and to have someone to love. The dating world is not in my favor. I have seen the darkest side of online dating and have been on one too many coffee dates that "just didn't feel right." I have taken romantic interest in friends only to be turned down to spare the friendship from harm. I have spent hours waiting for phone calls that never came. To be frank, I'm sick of dating.

This new year I've decided to come to a resolution that will not only benefit myself but trickle down into my other relationships. This year I'm dating myself. Now I am not swearing off to dating at all, but instead I am giving up the active search of relationships. If love comes knocking at my door, I will know that this is not my doing, but a divine intervention into my year of purposeful singleness. I need a new year to find myself. Treat myself to dinner and a movie or a night to "Netflix and chill." You see I have come to realize that I will never be able to fully learn to love another person if I don't first learn to love myself.

We often treat being single as a bad thing, but the reality is your time as a single person is a time to get to know yourself better. You have time to pursue your passions and travel to places you've dreamed of going. No inhibitions, no one waiting back at home for your return, just yourself and world full of opportunity.

I am saying goodbye to blind dates, casual hangouts, wedding dates and an attitude of loneliness. With this resolution, I am inviting all those around me to hold me accountable. I am ecstatic to see where this new relationship will take me and how it will affect my life and all those who are in it. I am not certain what 2017 will bring for me, but I know that this year I am going to date myself.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Dear College Students, Are You Undecided?
https://pixabay.com/photos/college-students-diploma-graduate-3990783/

Up until last week, I always had a major. I was an international business major, finance major, psych major on the pre-medicine track… and now (finally) I am exactly where I should have been when I started college: undecided. I think there is too much pressure as a high school student to have a designated path about what you want to study, be when you 'grow up' and essentially spend the rest of your life doing. As an 18-year-old, I really feel like I tried to pin myself down to a major so that I had a set path to follow and something to look towards. This is probably very conventional and I know tons of people at school who have their minds made up about what they want to study.

Keep Reading... Show less
Adulting

Life Is Messy

Finding who you are in your 20s

1533
Life Is Messy
https://www.pexels.com/photo/shallow-focus-photography-of-yellow-sunflower-field-under-sunny-sky-1169084/

I am 25 years old and just now learning who I am. When I separated from my husband I was terrified of what would follow. I did not know who I was outside of a relationship, nor did I know how to be on my own. It was scary, and I was so lost. I spent months discovering who I was, and what I wanted to be. I am still searching as I believe we never truly know who we are even when we "grow up". I came to the realization that I had been hiding a part of myself for my entire life. Coming out was not easy, growing up in the church made it scary, and hard. I was told growing up that being anything but straight was such a sin, and that i would spent my life in hell because of it. I came out to my parents when I was 25 years old. I picked up the phone and called my mom, and uttered the words "I'm queer" through tears. I knew my parents would be supportive, but that didn't make it any easier for me to vulnerable and raw. Since then, I have slowly started being more authentic in who I am, and not hide parts of me just because of people's shitty opinions.

Keep Reading... Show less
Adulting

Ask Your BFF These 20 Questions To See If They Know You As Well As You THINK That They Do

Ask your best friend these basic questions to see just how well they know you.

40476
Ask Your BFF These 20 Questions To See If They Know You As Well As You THINK That They Do

My best friend has been in my life since we were 3 years old, now that we are adults now, I'd like to ask her these questions to see how well she knows me.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Alone At The Met

I survive a day alone in NYC.

10521
Wikimedia Commons

It was six in the evening. I was sitting in the courtyard of a Renaissance-era Italian villa, glancing around at the statues, most notably one of a boy removing a thorn from his foot. Despite the supposedly relaxing setting, I was incredibly anxious. My phone was at less than 5 percent battery, and once it died I would be completely disconnected from my family and peers, alone in one of the largest art museums in the country.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

College 101: How To Ease The Back To School Blues

Getting back into the school groove when you just can't seem to let go of summer.

11570
Beyond The States

With fall classes just beginning, many of us find ourselves struck with summer withdrawals. Especially for those who refrained from taking courses over the summer, it can be quite difficult to get back in the swing of things. Fortunately, there are various ways to help make the transition back to college as smooth as possible.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments