Home is truly where the heart is.

Going into my freshman year, I can remember being excited about a brand new start, and being on my own.

It was a rollercoaster of an adjustment for me. From random fire alarms to finding out who my real friends were the hard way, it made me a new person.

A new person that I thought could never have developed without the support of home.

What made me realize how I became more appreciative of being home. Now as a junior, I look forward to going home every weekend that I can.

Since I’m still in the dorms, it made me appreciate home more. This year, I started to get jealous of my friends who managed to move off campus. I also begin to second-guess my choice of staying in the dorms after seeing their houses and apartments.

That moment hit me when I saw my friends Brooke and Jess’s townhouse. Their place had a very homey feel. Every time I step in there, I never want to leave. It eliminated all the anxieties about being in a dorm for the third year away.

So, what do I mean by anxiety?

During my freshman year, I lived in a brand-new dormitory. Unfortunately, it had some kinks that needed to be worked out: the fire alarms. It would go off at random times you never would know whether it was a drill or not. Most of them would happen at night.

Due to my autism, I’m sensitive to loud noises. Throughout my grade school years, I was always notified about whenever a drill was going to happen. In recent years, I feel that I overcame so much in regards to my autism. However, those unpleasant feelings of the fire alarm never went away.

To this day, I still get paranoid about the fire alarm going off in the middle of the night. Even though I’m in another dormitory this year, those thoughts still continue.

The loudness and the randomness has and still bothers me. I’m very sensitive to its loud noises due to my autism. I feel like I had post traumatic stress from it.

Every time I would go to bed, my mind wouldn’t be at peace. I would feel uneasy every time I got under the covers. I would often have mental flashbacks every time I'm in my room. It's almost too vivid for me to forget.

I would have the desire to sleep at my friends’ off-campus housing or the couches at the student center. Heck, if I could sleep at the library, I would. Now, I’m stay out of my dorm as often as possible because of the fear and thoughts I have whenever I'm in there.

The peace and tranquility of home is something that I really miss. It gave me somewhere where I know I can sleep peacefully at night. I really like my sleep and I know how crucial it is for me as a college student.

Because of those fears, sometimes I wish I could have just commuted to college. I can also remember how right before school started, I just wasn’t looking forward to going back for that reason.

Luckily as of now, there’s been only one drill. Thankfully, I wasn’t there for it.

I feel also that since I’m not a huge partier, it gave me something to do on the weekends. Going home allow me to do something on the weekends whenever my friends were busy.

I also enjoyed the fact of knowing that I can work on the weekends. Being able to work on the weekends is giving me a legitimate reason to go home. I try to make sure that I’m working as much as I can so I can go home as often.

But most of all, I’ve also become more grateful for my parents throughout college. I’m just so thankful to have parents who were there for me whenever I need anything. I truly don’t know where I would be without their love and support.

I also really love spending time with my dog, Finn. His companionship

I always say I wish I could take him with me.

Another thing that I’ve learned over the last few years in college is how much I miss my sister. I felt while growing up, I took her for granted. I mean yes we had the typical sibling relationships that featured arguments, hugs and kisses along with supporting one another in each other's endeavors.

Don’t get me wrong, I love her. Now that she’s halfway through high school and on her way to young adulthood, I feel more attached. I am now beginning to see what my mother has told me about how much closer her and I will become as we got older.

Having that easy one hour access to home one the reasons why I picked Millersville. I don’t know how I could’ve survived a greater distance from my family. I’m sure my folks can say the same thing!

This is not to say that I don’t stay at school on some weekends.

Recently, last weekend the first weekend I’ve stayed because I didn’t have work and my friends and I had plans. I did have a good time with my friends on Saturday night and on a university-sponsored trip to Baltimore for an Orioles game the following Sunday afternoon.

College has taught me to appreciate home and to never take it for granted. I’ve become more attached to it. An attachment that has made me sometimes wonder about whether or not I made the right decision to come to Millersville.

What brings me back to reality is knowing the fact that I have a great base both here, at school, and at home. I also keep reminding myself that an hour away from home is not that far. I also keep in mind that I am always welcomed home whenever I wish.