The holiday season ––right around the beginning of November to the New Year–– has always been a hard time for me. Whenever people ask, "do you like Christmas?" or "are you getting into the holiday spirit?" I can't help but feel resentful. Not towards the person asking me, but towards the "holly jolly" atmosphere that everyone seems to breathe during the holiday seasons. What I hate most is how some people do not understand the complicated feelings I have for the holidays.

Don't get me wrong: Thanksgiving is great. You get to be thankful, eat yummy food and spend time with loved ones. Christmas is just as wonderful: it is a special time for everyone of any culture or religion. Personally, I'm happy that others are happy during this time of year, but I would rather enjoy it from a distance.

Several victims of trauma and PTSD experience an event known as "anniversary reactions:" according to the U.S. Department of Veteran Affairs, survivors of a traumatic event will experience a period of distress and other symptoms during the "anniversary" of the event. The victims of these reactions may be survivors of mental, emotional, or physical abuse, and in, either way, the anniversary is an incredibly distressing time.

Growing up, almost every holiday season was spent in high anxiety from one thing or another. The actions of certain family members generated an adversity to the joyful season, as it was not joyful to me at all. It wasn't until about two years ago that I was able to escape the pain that came with the holidays, but I am now left with negative memories and anxiety and I try to distance myself from most holiday activities.

When someone tries to rub their holiday spirit into my face, the first thing I say is that "I hate Christmas," in which I get a response like, "C'mon, don't be a bah humbug!" In reality, I don't actually hate holidays. I just want people to stop "trying" to get me into spirits and to stop trying after I tell them the first time.

I know that I can't be the only one out there who relives negative episodes, so here is a message for anyone who meets a "bah humbug" this season: please be respectful of our feelings. Anniversaries of events (in general) are very hard on us, and we just want to enjoy the anniversary comfortably and without as much pain as possible.

On that note, have a happy holiday season. Remember, while it may be the best time of the year for you, just be respectful of the supposed "bah humbugs" of the season. You never know what they have gone through.

If you or someone you know is in need of support this holiday season or just needs someone to talk to, call the Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. They specialize in support for those with PTSD as well as other mental illnesses.