There is a sort of indescribable feeling that comes along with the start of a new year. It is the same thing every year, I'm excited, jittery, yet a little nervous. To a certain extent, I feel that it is so final. It is such a definite ending to a specific chapter in your life, whether you like it or not. But on the flip side of that, the chapter can start any way that you would like.
The new year can be such an empowering time because positivity is flowing everywhere. People are beginning their resolutions and looking forward to changing their habits whether they stay with them or not. I always love having a definite indicator for a fresh start.
This past year, out of all years, has felt the most final because my semester has ended. My grades are final, there is no homework over the holidays, and I can let any negativity stemming from the fall semester behind me. Although there were negatives, I am happy to say that there were so many positives. I met so many amazing people, I'm living with my best friend, had awesome experiences, and removed people from my life that had been ruining it for a while now, even though I hadn't noticed.
In 2017, I definitely realized who I was, which I didn't seem to have a handle on in years prior. I found myself in the same cycle for literally years, with the same toxic people and toxic happens. If people are meant to be in your life, they will actually make an effort to be in it, to see you, to have decent conversations with you, and to lift you up. From a few people, I did not see any progress and it was getting me down. Although, at first, it was painful to completely remove them from my life, I can definitely say that it was very worth it. I have never felt more comfortable in the people I surround myself with, especially the very good friends I have.
I'm sad to be closing a chapter, but I'm happy to be starting a new one. I'm hoping to make progress in my schooling, friendships, and sense of self, and well as making an effort to making people like they are in a positive space when they are with me. Here's to new beginnings.
