College is a period of time where you discover who you are and what you are capable of. This is the time where your identity truly unveils itself, and you can follow your heart toward your dreams. There are so many life-changing events that take place during your high school to college to real life transition, it can be a bit overwhelming. What better way to go about this adventure than with your significant other by your side? I know what you’re thinking, this idea seems rather contradictory. How can you find yourself if you are not looking alone? Let me explain.
There are some people that come into your life for the sole purpose of showing you who you really are. I can honestly say that I would not be the person I am today if it weren’t for my long-term relationship. Being in a long-term relationship has shown me the good, the bad and the ugly of who I really am. I have discovered more about my personality and my wants in life through this relationship than through any other life experience. I have learned about my temper, about some deep-rooted hurt that needed to be resolved and about my wishes for my future. I have been able to better myself throughout these three and a half years by having someone so close to my heart. He isn’t afraid to hurt my feelings if it means helping me in the end. He will be honest about my flaws if it means it will help me grow and become greater than them. But, all of this could be done at any point in my life, not necessarily during college, so why is it any more beneficial to have a long-term relationship in college?
Ultimately, it comes down to this. Not everyone will benefit from a long-term relationship in college — some will probably do worse. However, some will blossom — as I believe I have. During college, you are in one of the most vulnerable times in life, and every experience has the potential to mold you and change your life. This change doesn’t have to be bad. A long-term relationship can bring so many positive aspects into your life, but here’s the catch. You can only benefit from a long-term relationship if you remember that this is a time in your life you will never get back, and to make the most of it. College years are so crucial to building a foundation to the rest of your life, and a long-term relationship shouldn’t hold you back from your goals in life. If you have put your wants and desires aside for the sole purpose of being in a long-term relationship, you’re doing it wrong.
That being said, if you treat this relationship right, it can be an amazing experience. Through your years in school, having someone to go through each day with is incredible. You will have a partner-in-crime. You will have someone to depend on during the hardest times when your friends aren’t there. You will have motivation to do well. You will have many memories to make. By being in a long-term relationship, you will learn how to communicate deeply with people, how to manage your time to include another person, how to be your own person — regardless of what others think. You will always have someone to lean on, and college is a time in your life when you really might need someone to help you through it all.
For some reason, there is this notion that you cannot succeed in college if you are “tied down” to someone. That is, you are unable to be your own person or to have fun and make friends if you are in a relationship. I am here to tell you, this doesn’t have to be the case. There are so many joys to being in a strong, grounded relationship. You will be much happier if you follow your heart and allow it to be open to finding love, rather than shutting out the idea for the sole fear of getting “caught up in a relationship.” My long-term relationship has opened my eyes to the future that I have always been afraid of, and I believe that together, we can do anything. Don’t let the world tell you that is a bad idea to fall in love in college and to be in a steady relationship. You might miss out on some great life lessons and amazing experiences.
