These Are The Dynamics Of A Happy Relationship

These Are The Dynamics Of A Happy Relationship

It's not just love that keeps a relationship afloat.

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I would like to begin by saying that this piece is not directed for abusive relationships or for couples who are poisonous to one-another. If you believe your partner is abusive, narcissistic, or has a poisonous personality, it's best to step away from that relationship or seek professional help. Instead, I would like to discuss my ideas on what makes a couple happy and well-functioning and how to improve that connection. Sometimes a relationship can flourish but instead we abandon it too quickly because we might not know how to work on it.

We have all heard that the most important thing in a relationship is communication, and if you haven't heard it before, here I am with the news. We should step a little further back and begin with love as being the central connection between the couple, but note that it's not enough to keep the relationship happy. Before you decide whether or not you should work on the relationship or improving the relationship, make sure you and your significant other share love.

Over the course of your relationship, that love will shift and change, you'll see it fluctuate in different levels. I believe that this is a normal thing because people change. There will be periods of time that you or your partner might become depressed. Worries will develop from the external world or the internal self, which will cause a shift in emotions and views. There are also different stages in a relationship, like the beginning phase of discovery and excitement. Then there's a stage of balancing and harmonizing with each other's habits. Then there's a point when you two become used to each other. Of course, there's much more, but these are some key phases. Most importantly though, whether the love increases or decreases a little, make sure that the love is still there and the relationship isn't just wastefully running time.

And now, we dive back into communication and all the other steps that we can take to make sure that the loving couple sustains a healthy and happy relationship.

I've noticed that not all of us have proper education on a healthy relationship, and if we never had a real-life example, we get ideas of what love is from the movies. These ideas have been seeping into our brains for years and we think this must be what love means. It's not. Many times, our partners will sense when we feel down, when we need something, or when we want to have surprises. It won't happen all the time, although we may dream. How do we get to the point of understanding our partners wants and needs? We communicate with them.

When you feel like you haven't received enough attention, let your partner know. When you feel like the world is on your shoulders and that's why you haven't been able to give attention, let your partner know. You'll be amazed at how much work can be done, as a team, by simply voicing your concerns. Don't let the concerns bottle up and explode in a moment of fury; notice the patterns and have an adult conversation. There are other issues and concerns you may want to address, but this was just one example.

Equally as important to voicing your concerns and communicating them, let your partner know what you hope to get from the relationship. Let them know what you like about them, try to boost the positive things they bring to the relationship so their efforts get recognized and rewarded. People need affirmation and guidance on the rights and wrongs. No one can read minds.

Besides the common but necessary communication advice, use the element of surprise. One of you might be better than the other at surprises, but it should come from both sides. Pack a bag and take a spontaneous weekend road trip. Turn off all the tech, light some candles, and give him or her a back rub (even if they didn't ask). Learn a new recipe and whip it up. Try somewhere new to eat for dinner instead of the restaurant you both enjoy. If it's tasty, then what a wonderful shared experience, and if it's awful, you'll have a story for a long time.

Space is another element to practice. I get why it's nice to always be around your loved one because honestly, I can be a needy person sometimes as I'm sure there are others like this. But the relationship has three parts, you, the other, and you together. Leave room for you to be you, and for him or her to be their self. When you give one-another room, you hit a refresh button on yourselves and on the relationship.

Make sure that the relationship has respect and understanding. It sounds so simple, but sometimes we can forget. We must discipline ourselves to be better to ourselves and to those around us. If I can harshly criticize and put myself down, and I love myself the most, then what makes me believe I won't do so to others. Make sure you give your significant other the respect that we sometimes forget to give ourselves. That means listen to their interests, respect their bodies and boundaries, engage in the things important to them such as their work or passion. And when your partner speaks, actively listen and comprehend their words to understand them.

Try to engage these things in your relationship and you might notice a difference in its quality. Relationships take work to function. Work towards a happier and healthier relationship because when we give up or stop trying, the relationship will fall apart.

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Plan These 13 Dates For Your Girlfriend This Fall And Thank Me Later

Listen up, guys.

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If you are a boy and you are reading this, plan one of these dates and you'll make your girlfriend the happiest person alive. Yeah, you can thank me later.

1. Go to a pumpkin patch.

This may be super basic but who doesn't want a cute little pumpkin around Halloween time. Usually, you will take a hayride to the pumpkin patch which is always a nice time to spend together. It will also be really cute seeing how excited she gets over finding the perfect little pumpkin.

2. Go on a hayride.

If you go to a pumpkin patch you may have the opportunity to go on a hayride and you definitely should! You will get to see all around the farm and the scenery is usually beautiful in the fall with the leaves changing colors!

3. Go apple picking.

This date will always allow for a cute photo shoot opportunity and everyone will be able to see your Insta post later captioned "the apple of my eye." Also, if you love apples what better place to get them then a local farm where you pick them yourself! Make sure you check your local farm to see when your favorite apples will be ready for harvest!

4. Bake something together.

There are so many amazing recipes for fall, apple pie being one of them. Which will be the perfect thing to bake with your S.O. after apple picking (two dates in one)!

5. Go to a local festival.

No matter where you are from there are probably a ton of local festivals around you throughout the fall. Whether it is a food festival, fall fest, music festival or even a lantern festival all of them are usually a perfect date. You can experience new things together and enjoy the fall weather.

6. Go to a football game.

Whether it is high school, college, or a professional football game any football is good football in the fall. Between a fun tailgate and an exciting game, if you are into sports football is the way to go.

7. Walk or hike around a state park.

No matter where you are from there are always state parks around you! Fall is the perfect time to go on an outdoor because it's not too hot to too cold. The scenery is always beautiful with all of the leaves changing colors. If there is a lake you could always go kayaking or paddle boating!

8. Visit your local farm.

A lot of local farms have fresh veggies, apples, baked goods and of course pumpkins! Also, check and see if your local farm has any fall family days. On those days they usually have a lot of fun activities, animals, hayrides, corn mazes, pumpkins and if you're lucky they'll have amazing apple cider donuts!

9. Stay in for a cozy movie day.

With Freeform starting their 31 days of Halloween this leads to the perfect excuse for a night on the couch. Pick out your favorite Halloween movie, make some popcorn and have some warm apple cider while cuddling up on the couch.

10. Visit a haunted house.

If you are down for something a little scarier then a Halloween movie, check out a haunted house near yours. It could even be a haunted hayride or haunted corn maze.

11. Take her out to breakfast.

Girls are always down for a cute breakfast date. Especially when you can roll out of beds in your sweats and keep them on in the cozy fall weather.

12. Spend a night carving pumpkins.

Once Halloween rolls around you should grab a cheap carving supplies kit, roll up your sleeves, and carve a cute pumpkin together. Whether you write your initials or create a jack-o-lantern it will probably be full of fun memories of pulling out pumpkin guts.

13. Go to a Halloween party.

Take some time and hit up Pinterest for a super cute couples costume and eat all the candy you possibly can!

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10 Things You SHOULD Say On A First Date

Please, for the love of God, say all of these things.

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First dates can either be amazing or awful. Since my friends and I seem to have the best luck with them, I've decided to provide a list of everything you should say on a first date. Be sure to say every single sentence numbered here, and you're guaranteed to get a second date!

1. "Is that what you're wearing?"

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You really want to make sure you give your date a long, hard look when you're saying this. They'll take it as a compliment, and will want to get the date started immediately.

2. "You look tired."

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This is, hands down, the best thing to say to someone when you first sit down. If they have bags under their eyes, be sure to point them out as well, and describe them as dark and huge!

3. "You look a lot different than I thought you would."

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This typically works best if you're first meeting someone. Make your date feel more comfortable by blatantly telling them that they look nothing like how you imagined. Describe your concern further by saying they look old and they'll love you forever.

4. "Well, this awkward."

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Your date will be beside themselves once you say this. You will have them swooning over you in no time.

5. "Have you showered today?"

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This is a simple way to start the conversation! Take a good, long look at your date's hair, make a disgusted face, and ask away. They'll thank you for being so considerate and caring about their wellbeing.

6. "How often do you wash your face?"

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Another winner, if I do say so myself. Your date will recognize that you are just looking out for their hygienic needs. Be sure to ask if their acne has always been this bad to get to know them on a much deeper level.

7. "You should invest in deodorant."

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Does your date smell bad? If so, tell them what they need! They won't be able to thank you enough.

8. "Our zodiac signs aren't compatible..."

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Say this and mean it. If the Internet says you aren't compatible with someone because of their birth date, then it must be true. Don't waste your time.

9. "This isn't going to go well."

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You can easily throw this in at any and every point of the date. Not only will your date appreciate your realism, they'll also realize how capable of being arrogant you are. Such a turn on!

10. "We need to wrap this up."

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Everything needs to be wrapped up at some point, right (just like this article)? Say it like you mean it. This date must end. It has to end. You need it to wrap up, and you better let your date know.

With all of this information, you can now go out into the world and go on as many first dates as possible. Use all of these phrases, and you will for sure win someone over, whether it be the first time or the hundredth time.

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