As an 8-year-old girl I would be woken up by two loving parents, one with a home-cooked breakfast ready on the table and one lying out my outfit for the full day of school ahead. My dad would drive me to school where I was a quiet, yet high-end learner who excelled at almost anything I put my mind to. I was humble and determined, and looked at every challenge as a way to better myself. After the bus ride home from school I would eat another home-cooked meal for dinner, then either go to one of my three dance classes at the time, sports practices, or play outside with the rest of the neighborhood kids.
Nothing to complain about, right? Precisely. Until the age of social media I was an energetic, loving, fearless, independent little girl who was presented with endless amounts of grateful opportunities. My aura was vibrant and everyone could see it.
Kids are notorious for speaking their minds and having no filters. They would do whatever they wanted, because they believed they could. Excelling in basketball, baseball, volleyball, dance, and horse-backing riding, I feel like my childhood self could prove this statement. I would see something I wanted to accomplish and tackle it with the help of my very supportive parents. Around freshman year of high school that all changed, and I haven’t noticed until now.
When did I start hating myself? When did hating myself become normal? Why do I scroll through posts only about people wanting what they cannot or will not ever have? And when did reading a post about someone explaining their accomplishments or new relationships make everyone roll their eyes and sigh in bitterness?
It all started when I became a member of the social media culture of society.
Through Instagram, Tumblr, Twitter, and Facebook posts, society says if I don’t look a certain way or present myself in a particular way, I am overlooked. I won’t obtain any attention if I don’t flaunt my top-notch fashion along with my edgy yet humbled and blessed attitude. Don’t forget about my perfectly pin-straight beach-blonde hair, bright blue eyes, acne-free face, flawless natural tan looking skin, plumped lips, waxed brows, winged eyeliner, blindingly white teeth, big bust, slim waste, tight abs, bubble butt, and thick thighs, all with little to no percentage of fat anywhere on my body. Easy, right? I’ll fit right in, be loved by everyone and reach a few thousand followers on my Instagram account.
Yeah, right.
Society also says to love yourself. Your relationship with yourself is the most important one. You must be confident in your own skin in order to find love and a place in this world. In order to be successful you must be honest with yourself. You don’t need any make up or expensive clothes to gain a place in this world. So, tell me society, when a 165 pound five-foot-seven strawberry-blond girl, with highlights grown out in need out a touch up, brows in need of tweezing, lips a pencil thin line, with a few acne blemishes on her chin flashes a big smile in an Instagram post because she was ‘feeling herself’ that day with the hashtag #nomakeupmonday gets stomped on, slandered, and overlooked for being “confident in her own skin?”
Tell me why it’s more acceptable to read about a girl who wishes to be somebody else, than reading about a girl who loves herself for who she is?
Tell me why when someone is feeling a bit lonely and in need of a friend they send out innocent tweets asking if a kind soul would like to accompany them in a trip to Dairy Queen to their few hundred followers, is then suddenly targeted for being a pathetic attention-seeker?
Tell me why nearly every girl between the ages of 13 - 21 want to be models with the same exact #relationshipgoals, including a picture-perfect boyfriend whom they can travel the world with?
Society: “Love yourself, take care of yourself, shine bright and do not let anyone stop you! You are beautiful just the way you are!”
Also society: “But don’t post too many selfies or else you’re full of yourself. You should probably skip the milkshake because your stomach isn’t flat. Don’t take advantage of this social media platform by asking everyone at once if they would like to hang out with you. That’s too demanding.”
The point being, put bluntly, society is seriously f*cked up. I want to express the cliché here and say do whatever you want to do if it makes you happy, and as long as it doesn’t hurt others in the end. If you’re feeling your outfit for the day, take a mirror pic and post it. If you are craving a milkshake, go and get one. Do not let these unwritten and unpublished rules that this world has formed dictate your life. My privileged and loved eight-year-old self would be disgusted with the way I let society turn me into a timid, frightened, self-hating creature. Do not conform or believe anything "society" pushes you toward. It is unhealthy.
