Don't get me wrong. I have no problem being single (except during those cold winter nights). I get to do what I want to do, go where I want to go all while only considering myself (I promise I'm much more selfless than that sentence makes me sound). Besides that, I am only 20 years old and am in no rush to get hitched anytime soon. I'm enjoying my college experience and figuring out who I am as an individual, and then with another person.
Nonetheless, in the past year or so I have become more interested in dating and working towards a relationship considering it's with the right guy. And in the past year or so I've concluded one thing so far which is: I hate being dating as a woman of the 21st century. Although I have nothing to compare my current experiences with, considering I was not alive or dating during a majority of the 20th century (I don't think my preschool boyfriend of 1999 really counts). However, I have enough knowledge about the past to know that times have changed. And when it comes to being a single woman who is dating during the 21st century, I'm wishing some things would have stayed the same. Without further ado, here are 5 reasons why I hate being a single woman who is dating in 2016:
1. What happened to courting?
In the 21st century, some guy's idea of a date/courting is "Netflix and Chill" (don't even get me started). It's strange how we most likely have more activities to pick from for dates and somehow still end up with the most disconnected one. The whole point of going out and dating is to learn about the other person and to see if there is chemistry, not lust. In my opinion, guys aren't working as hard in this day in age to win a true woman over.
2. Chivalry isn't dead.
(This GIF is the cutest thing ever!) Sure, feminism is a great thing but it doesn't mean men should no longer open doors or pull out chairs or pick up the bill every now and then. Don't get me wrong; I am a strong,independent... woman. I can very well do any of those things for myself. However, going back to the whole "courting" ideal, the more chivalrous actions the man performs, the more flattered and appreciative I will be. I'd love for a guy to open my car door or bring me flowers on the first date (or any date at that). It shows me that he values me enough to do such small things that make all the difference.
3. Apparently complimenting isn't a thing anymore.
Or maybe I'm just going out with the wrong guys...?
So I love the movie Aladdin in general. However, I practically fall over with adornment when Aladdin describes Jasmine at first glance. From the excitement and amazement in his voice, to the expression of awe on his face, to the way he uses his hands to emphasize her beauty, this guy has no problem acknowledge his girl's beauty. Maybe he doesn't say it directly to her at that point and time, but that's besides the point. In this day and age of dating, so much is left unsaid when it comes to complimenting (I have to admit even from the women's side I think). Sure, it sounds self-centered and slightly insecure to want a compliment, but what's wrong with wanting the guy you're interested to verbally acknowledge how nice you look? Yeah you got dressed up for yourself, but he's still a bonus.
4. Communication nowadays is either in person or through texting.
Since cellphones didn't exist until a few decades ago, back in the day people use to have to pick up a phone and dial the other person to see how their day was or to make plans. Personally, if I'm dating someone I'd rather hear their voice than to see those three dots that communicate that something is being typed. It makes the relationship more personable and makes if easier to get to know who the other person is.
5. Women are way too sexualized for my liking
There were many more gifs to pick from to make my point using Nikki Minaj's "Anaconda" music video... but they slightly made me uncomfortable. This is point number 5 on why it sucks to be a woman dating in the 21st century because the way that women are portrayed in popular culture go hand in hand in the way they are treated, talked about, and looked at. Since women aren't into long skirts and dresses as much anymore, men apparently find it acceptable to refer to us in more derogatory ways and to treat us with less respect. Due to this, the hookup culture has become much more prominent. When it comes to dating though, it isn't all about sex and I don't believe the media should be used to define our dating culture.
When it comes down to it... I kinda wish I could skip the dating portion of getting into a relationship. At the same time, I'm young, should be having fun and enjoying every second (the good, the bad, and the ugly).
