Author and poet, Mildred Barthel, once said “happiness is a conscious choice, not an automatic response.” Meaning, one may express themselves in a way that can be interpreted as such, but unless that person is making a conscious decision to be happy, they will not TRULY be experiencing happiness.
1. So what is the meaning of happiness?
Happiness is defined on an individual basis. Like most things, there is no intrinsic meaning behind happiness. We did not consciously decide the meaning of happiness, and we're probably following the guidelines of what was taught to us growing up. Hopefully after reading this, you will be able to define happiness in your own words; thoughts, or actions because happiness is what you want it to be.
There are many events in one's life that can contribute to their overall happiness or unhappiness. For example, the difference between failing an exam or passing an exam, a death in the family, or a bad day at work. Such situations lead to the idea that our experiences cause a fluctuation in emotions and attitudes. The problem with that instability comes when we allow our emotions to take over. This directly affects the way we live, as the things we say or do become unpredictable and emotionally biased.
2. If happiness is a choice, why am I unhappy?
Some may say that choosing to be happy at any point is simply unrealistic. However, as a conscious human being, you have the power to assign meaning and significance to everything that happens to you. We as individuals can control very little outside ourselves. Although, if you are able to recognize when you are suffering, you can then identify what meaning you have placed on that situation, and change your perspective.
As stated before, an emotional response is a conscious choice. While it may not be easy, if you consciously choose to be happy, you gain all the control and power that comes with that decision. When that decision becomes a consistent practice, your perspective will no doubt change for the better. This doesn't mean that you'll be immune to all unfortunate situations, because negativity is inevitable. Let it be noted that there is nothing inherently wrong with being unhappy. Negative feelings and experiences are part of the human experience and they allow you to grow as you begin recognizing and dealing with these things. Changing your approach and response to negativity will allow you to become a more rational thinker. Learning how to face these situations rationally is an important part of shifted thinking and being in tune with your own conscientiousness.
3. But I am depressed, so it's not that simple.
According to the World Health Organization more than 350 million people worldwide are affected by some form of depression. Depression is caused by a combination of genetic, biological, environmental and psychological factors and by the year 2020, it will be the second leading cause of disability, next to heart disease. It is a common and very serious disability. You are not alone and the good news is there are many ways to treat and explain the way you're feeling. I acknowledge the difficulty that comes with treating a mental illness and have experienced, firsthand, the helplessness and isolation one can feel when suffering from depression. Happiness seems so far away and completely out of your control. The first thing you need to realize is there IS hope and you CAN be happy. It may not be easy, but it is possible. Start today, you have the power, all you need is the motivation. If you think you might be suffering from depression contact a professional for information on appropriate treatment resources.
*If you, or someone you know if suffering from depression:
Signs Of Depression
Give your happiness the authenticity it deserves. Be honest with your emotions and don't get wrapped up in the things you can't control. It's natural to feel mad, or sad and it's a healthy part of life. However, the way we experience life is a direct reflection of the way we handle situations. So, if you're unhappy with the way your life is going--you may need to change your perspective and re-evaluate the aspects in which you are allowing control. Wake up in the morning and CHOOSE to have a good day. Radiate positivity, smile at yourself in the mirror and understand that you are the dictator of your own life. You are responsible for your own happiness.
