A lot of people mistake their sadness for depression. They have a bad day, oh, they're depressed. Then the sad feeling goes away, and they think they're better. We all have moments where we are sad. We all have bad days. It is what makes us human.
When you truly live with depression, that is when you understand that it isn’t just the emotional feeling of being sad. It’s a state of being. It comes into your life, unwelcome like a storm destroying everything in its path, no matter how bad you try to fight it.
It is a cloud that hovers over you, or that pesky fly that keeps buzzing around you. Even when you're experiencing a happy moment, you know how quickly it can change. You try your best to be happy, but it just doesn't work for you. In return, you feel guilty for something that you can not control.
People that battle with depression don't decide to just "be sad" one day. It is not a choice to feel like your world is crumbling below your feet. People with depression wish more than anything they could just "be happy." They wish with all their heart that their smile could brighten their own self, like it does to those around them.
That is just the thing. The laughter and smile of someone battling depression is the happiest person in the room.
Depression is a darkness that you think no one else understands.
Depression is forcing yourself to get out of the bed when all you want to do is lay there and stare at the ceiling.
Depression is putting effort into your outfit and makeup, because you try to look better than you feel.
Depression is smiling the biggest.
Depression is telling the best jokes to everyone.
Depression is you shining your light so bright, because you want everyone else to feel beautiful, even when you don't.
Depression is the person everyone loves having around, because it can make them happy.
Being other people's happiness gives you hope though.
It gives you hope that maybe your smile and kind words made someone else's day a little brighter.
Depression is telling someone "oh, I am fine," or "I'm just tired," when really you are anything from it.
Depression is thinking you are different from the world, when really you're not alone.
Depression is getting up again and starting a new day.
Despite how dark you may think the world is, you try to be the brightest light in the room.
More than anything, depression is the happiest person in the room. Choosing to seem happy, and making other people happy, gives depression sufferers a satisfaction that they did something right today.
To someone who does not understand what a depression sufferer goes through — realize that it is not a choice. The brain of a depressed person is physically different from that of someone who is mentally healthy. The “feel-good” chemicals that provide them with a sense of pleasure and motivation are not operating correctly, so they don't choose how they feel. Be loving and patient with them.
And to any depression sufferers, understand this; It is a big, big world we live in. You have to be brave for those around you, but most importantly, for yourself. You have to keep going. That voice will always be in the back of your head, but you will learn how to silence it. The feelings you have are not permanent. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, and when you make it there, you will be your own kind of happy- no longer taken over by the depression.
