No matter how old you are, you are never old enough for the once-a-year indulgence that is Halloween candy.
Sure, you have learned to monitor your sugar intake as you've gotten older but, let's be real, you're going to stick your hand in the candy bucket between Trick-or-Treaters. After a long night of answering the door, you're going to reward yourself with another handful of candy. The following weeks you are stuck with the reality of being an adult after Halloween: leftover candy that looms in the corner of your kitchen, trying to seduce you into cheating on a "clean 'till Thanksgiving" diet.
The struggle, my friends, can be all too real.
No matter your particular stance on Halloween candies or your personal level of self-control when it comes to these treats, you are bound to have at least one piece of sugary goodness before the month comes to a close. If you're one of those that has the self-control that we all envy and can get by on a single piece of candy in this time frame, allow me to make a few suggestions that will guarantee your selection will be the best.
Hershey's Candy Corn Bar
What can I say about this one? Candy corn is a hotly debated candy that always comes to the forefront of confectionery discussion at this time of the year. Some people think it's the best thing ever, some people think it's disgusting (they're wrong).
My fellow candy corn lovers, join me in increasing our numbers of supporters by encouraging your fun-hating friends to at least give this bar a shot. It's chocolate, after all...everyone loves chocolate.
Pumpkin Pie M&M's
Think of all of the things you can about fall: pumpkins, leaves, oranges and reds everywhere, the smell of pumpkin pie wafting from the kitchen. Throw all of that together in a vat of white chocolate and you have Pumpkin Pie M&M's. They may require a little more prep-work for trick-or-treaters but that doesn't mean you can't have a bowl ready for your own enjoyment! If you're like me and find yourself somewhat bothered by the constant ringing of the doorbell and knocking on the door that Halloween brings, cozy up on the front porch with these as your secret stash and I promise it will be a hundred times more tolerable. A thousand times more tolerable with a bowl of candy corn, but that's just my two cents.
Reese's Lovers Snack-Size Assortment
Yet another one of my personal favorites is the Reese's Cup. They're so simple, just a small hunk of salty peanut butter enrobed in a thin layer of sweet chocolate that, no matter how quickly you eat it, will ultimately melt in your hands.
Well, at least it used to be that simple.
Now they've taken Reese's to a new level by not only adding fun seasonal shapes (ghosts and bats!), but by adding extra ingredients such as nougat, peanuts, and even Reese's Pieces. Be still, my beating heart, the season of endless Reese's products is upon us.
Bonus tip: The white chocolate variety are, arguably, the best of the bunch. And you should definitely chase it with a handful of delicious candy corn.
Sour Patch Kids Candy Corn
So here's a tricky question for you candy corn-hating weirdos: what do you do about this one if you love Sour Patch Kids?
Do you continue in your madness, insisting that you hate all things related to or even suggestive of candy corn and risk the chance that you never find your new favorite seasonal candy?
Or do you take a chance with candy corn, telling yourself that they are, technically, Sour Patch Kids, after all?
Decisions are scary but it is Halloween. Do you fall for the trick or take the treat?
Ah, Dove. The Classy Lady (who can still chill with the little kids) of the candy gang. This year, Dove has stepped it up to a new level of festivities by adding cookie crisps, almonds, and cashews to the lineup as well as adding a cute little graphic to the foil of the delights in this mix. Just look at them! Aren't the chevron and polka dot patterns on those little foil pumpkins just too adorable to resist!
Fine, have it your way.
Many can, somehow, resist the draw of candy corn but few of us can resist the lure of chocolate.
Cadbury Scream Eggs
"But Cadbury Eggs are for Easter!" You protest.
Well, they were...until now.
Now, Cadbury has spread its horizons to sell the eggs in the fall as well, marketing them as "Cadbury Screams," which, personally, I find to be an adorable turn of phrase. The green slime interior? Not as cute.
Who knows, it may add an extra layer of delicious to your Easter treat of choice.
But, personally, I will continue to make the right decision and munch on candy corn while I watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas".
Cookies & Scream M&M's
Fine, I'll admit it: I'm a sucker for clever marketing that turns relevant phrases into a catchy moniker that makes you grab a bag and hate yourself for it moments later when you're in the parking lot, stuffing your face.
If you're a fan of cookies & cream, M&M's, dark and white chocolate in a glorious dance of sugary bliss, or even just cute names, I highly suggest you give this one a shot.
Just like the world needs to give candy corn a shot.
Candy Corn M&M's
I return to my case in point: candy corn is not disgusting. However, I understand that some unfortunate souls have convinced themselves that it is to be avoided at all costs.
Listen up, do not lie to yourself here. It's still an M&M, at least give it a shot in the chance that it doesn't taste like candy corn to you.
Or maybe it does and you just can't admit you like candy corn.
Milk Oreo Chocolate Fun Size Bars
Yet another item for the cookies and cream lover is the fun-sized version of the Milka Oreo bar. Surely I don't have to recommend this to those of you that have had the full-sized version but, for those of you that haven't had that blessing, I urge you to drive to your nearest grocery store and purchase an entire bag right now.
I mean, what's better than consuming Milka chocolate and Oreos at the same time? Consuming them in bite-sized portions.
Or consuming candy corn.
Reese's Halloween Crunchy Cookie Peanut Butter Cup Minis
If you've reached this point and have found yourself torn between several options that feature your favorite (candy corn and chocolate? Outstanding combo that I wish I had thought of myself because it's genius), fear not! I have found the solution, at least for those of you that are stuck between all things Oreo/cookies and cream and Reese's products!
Introducing: Reese's miniature cups stuffed with crunchy cookies!
Oh yes, those giant cups that you found in the gas station last year? Yeah, now those are available in Halloween-ready bags of miniatures. Rejoice or fear, you know you're going to buy them.
Surely they can be found in the same aisle as the candy corn.
Snickers X-Scream Fun-Size
Aside from the candy corn-hating weirdos, there's one group in the realm of candy preferences that I simply do not understand.
Those that don't like nougat.
I mean, cmon. What did nougat ever do to you? It's so simple, so light and airy, nicely textured, relatively easy to make.
Regardless of whatever offense you have apparently suffered at the hands of nougat, Mars has heard your cry and now offers fun-sized versions of their Snickers Xtreme, which offers all of the chocolate, caramel, and peanuts of a Snickers bar but deprives you of the nougat.
Not to mention it has another one of those cute little turns of phrase names that are just so humbling and lovable.
Pumpkin Pie Kit Kats
Have you ever found yourself looking for a sweet snack and found yourself thinking "Hmm...Kit-Kat or Pumpkin Pie? Kit-Kat or Pumpkin Pie? Kit-Kat or Pumpkin Pie?"
Yeah, me neither. (Of course, I always go for candy corn over either of those because I'm a sensible human being).
Now close the refrigerator and grab a Kit-Kat.
Hershey's Caramel Apple Filled Chocolates
When I think of Halloween, I always think of hayrides, corn mazes, candy corn, and caramel apples.
What's better than caramel apples? Caramel apples with chocolate.
Even better? No, not caramel apples with candy corn stuck all over them. I do have some limitations.
The ultimate Halloween treat that is both delicious, filled with apple, chocolate, and caramel flavors without all of the sticky mess of an actual caramel-coated apple is Hershey's clever invention: a poppable bite of chocolate that is filled with caramel and apple flavor.
All of the joy of Halloween and no mess. Okay, maybe only less of a mess. We all know the easy-melting quality of Hershey's chocolate is great on the tongue but disastrous in the palm.
So, regardless of how much or little candy you are aiming to eat this Halloween, there are always a few must-haves that promise to make your season spook-tacular!
Just make sure you always stock your candy dish with enough treats for the kids and keep at least one bag that you can "forget about" for yourself.
And stop hating on candy corn. It's a timeless classic and will never steer you wrong.
- 10 Kinds Of Neighbors You Experience On Halloween ›
- Please Don't Wear These 6 Halloween Costumes, They're Terrible ›
- 31 Candy Corny Halloween Jokes ›
- What Your Favorite Halloween Candy Says About Your Sex Life ›
- What Your Favorite Halloween Candy Says About You ›
- A Definitive Ranking Of The Best Halloween Treats ›
- If College Majors Were Halloween Candies ›