You’re the type of girl that likes to have her space, you enjoy treating yourself and doing things on your own. You’re not the first one to jump into someone’s arms, but you don’t necessarily want to be alone. So how do you date then? What rules should you set for yourself if you’re an independent badass, but you don’t want to come off as cocky or selfish? Well, I’ve put together a few tips and ideas of what you should do.

Whatever you do, never ever ever explain to your date how you always get your heart broken, or explain how you’re the one who always gets rejected.

I’ve experienced this first-hand from the other side, and it does not come across as confident. You’re pretty much telling your date that you’ve been rejected multiple times, which often scares the date, making them wonder, hmm, why did you get rejected?? Then they’ll start searching for your flaws, rather than focusing on all the good stuff. Come across as confident! Don’t be the victim here. You want to wow your date, so don’t reveal the stuff that makes you weak.

Ask questions!

Nobody likes the person who just sits there and doesn’t say anything. If you there’s an awkward silence, ask a question! You can never go wrong with simple questions like “What’s your favorite food/movie/etc.?” It might sound childish to ask questions like this, but it’ll start a conversation, and might branch off into several other conversations.

Always, always, always, be yourself.

Never put up a front, or pretend to be someone you’re not. If you go to the first date pretending to be the person that the other person wants you to be, when he/she finds out that you’re not actually that person, it’s not going to be good for anyone. So, just be yourself from the start.

Be funny/silly.

First dates are awkward, okay. They’re supposed to be that way. Don’t try to ignore that fact. If you’re bold enough like me, even bring up the fact that first dates are awkward. It’ll break the ice a little bit, and clear the air. That way there’s not this pressure to be perfect. Make the other person laugh! You don’t have to be serious, hot and sexy all the time. There’s a time for everything.

Remember that first impressions are everything.

Make sure you’re looking your best. Obviously looks aren’t everything, but for a first impression, you want to show the best version of yourself. Be kind. Everyone loves someone who's kind. Be sexy, but don’t over-do it. Don’t be the girl that drops her purse as she’s walking and bends over for her date to check out her ass, they can totally see that you’re doing that on purpose, and that comes across as conceited.

Don’t disclose everything right away.

Do not tell your first date about your whole childhood and the problems that your parents caused you and how you were depressed in 8th grade. I mean, yes, definitely get into that stuff later on, but the first date should be fun and light, not depressing. This will make you seem like you’re a depressing person, which is the opposite of what you want for a first date.

Laugh, smile.

Some people feel the need to be so serious and studious on the first date. Laughing and smiling is one of the most attractive things for people. If I see a person smile or laugh, I automatically want to talk to them.

Don’t take it too seriously.

You have your whole life to find someone. If they’re not compatible, don’t push it, and don’t get upset about it. Let life flow around you, have fun. That’s what life is all about, anyways.

Never sacrifice what makes you happy.

If the person you’re dating wants you to give up something you love, it’s not worth it. Don’t sacrifice something if it ultimately makes you happy. You are more important.

Say yes.

Sometimes it’s easy to make up excuses or say no because you’re scared, nervous or afraid of getting rejected. But the only way great things will happen is if you do say yes and go out on a limb and take a chance. Experience life.