It seems like only yesterday that I was moving into my dorm here at Monmouth University. I can clearly picture it as if it were yesterday — my stepdad struggling to climb the stairs lugging along my mini fridge, my shaking hands signing the residence hall poster that still hangs in the lobby and the dozens of people bustling around the cramped hallways, complaining about the lack of air conditioning. I remember the first night at the soccer game catching up with my EOF friends that I had parted with a month before after the summer program. I even remember that my roommate, the oddball that she is, decided to call me a marshmallow because apparently I reminded her of the cute little critters from "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs 2." In the blink of an eye, as if it really were only yesterday, these moments are gone and it’s finals week of spring semester. I’ve been through so much my first year of college. So what will I take away from it all?

I will take away a lot of memories. The memory of singing at karaoke that night in September and feeling my heart race as I stood alone in front of dozens of stares. The memory of movie nights with my friends and people falling into the awkward space between the bed and the wall. The memory of late night sleepy ha-has with my roommate as we went insane studying for finals. The memory of getting confused every time I sent my paper to be printed from a printer I never seemed to find in the confusing maze of bookshelves in the library. The memory of sitting through agonizingly long operas at my job and gossiping with coworkers during intermissions. The memory of lunch dates with friends either in the dining hall or the student center, the dining hall only an option if we wanted to have ice cream after we ate.

I will take away a lot of firsts. My first time climbing the Wilson steps trying to find my English class and not realizing how many there were (about 75) until I reached the top, my breath lost. My first day at my first job, awkwardly shuffling around the theatre trying to keep track of everything. My first time auditioning for anything and feeling unprepared as I heard everyone else singing behind the closed door. My first time tye-dying a t-shirt on the quad. My first therapy session in the student center. My first time staying up late to finish an assignment. My first time living away from home and feeling for the first time like an adult.

I will take away a lot of friendships. My friends from EOF who I managed to stay in touch with throughout the year. My coworkers — Christian, Olivia and Sara — who welcomed me with open arms into the Pollak family. Andrea, who I know will always understand my dog obsession and who will always be my coffee date. Monica, whose love of music inspires me to be more outgoing with my singing. Sierra, who as my first official college roommate, will always have a special place in my heart with her goldfish attention span and love of life.

Above all, I will take away a lot of lessons. Yes, I’ve learned about western civilization and calculus and science, but there’s so much more. I’ve learned that you can’t always be perfect, and that’s OK. I’ve learned that not everyone is going to treat you fairly, but you shouldn’t let that get you down. I’ve learned that the only person who can define who you are is you, and in the same way, the only person holding you back from living the life you want to live is you. I’ve learned that it’s OK to admit defeat and accept outside help, because sometimes there are things you cannot handle on your own. I’ve learned that putting yourself out there can be scary, but rewarding. I’ve learned that not all friendships are meant to last but those that are will help you get through the rough times. I’ve learned so much about myself in these past few months.

My freshman year of college wasn’t as perfect as I wanted it to be, but at the same time it wasn’t as terrifying either. As I look back on this year, there are so many things that I’m taking away from it all. I know that these things will follow me through college and help me take away even more with each passing year. All I have left to say is bring it on, sophomore year — I’m ready for you.