Growing up, I was an athlete who played multiple sports and in each of them, I received a trophy just for participating in that sport. I used to think "Oh wow cool I got a trophy just for playing and not for winning anything!". But now that I look back, I don’t think they are a good idea to give out to kids.

Because if you give your kid a trophy for doing nothing, then they’ll go on through life thinking they can do nothing and still be rewarded. But if they do not get a trophy or award just for playing or participating, you are teaching them that if they want something, they have to work for it because not everything in life will just be handed to you just because you showed up or participated.

Think about it from a sports aspect. Say your kid is playing basketball and he or she is not the best player and you give him/her a trophy just for playing a season and not having any real achievements. You are positively reinforcing him/her for doing nothing. So now that kid is going to go on thinking he or she can get rewarded for doing nothing and they won’t get better because you’re basically telling them they can get a trophy without practicing and not trying.

Unfortunately, that is not how the real world works.

You can’t just show up every day, do half ass work and expect your boss to promote you and give you a raise. The same thing goes for any sport, you can’t just show up to practice, not try, and expect your coach to make you a starter or expect to win a championship. So now let’s take that same kid who isn’t good at basketball and you tell him or her, "Listen, if you want a trophy or if you want to win a championship, then you have to work for it.".

I mean yeah, they may be upset and cry but again, they have to learn to toughen up a bit and learn to work for that trophy or medal. Because when they put in the effort and that hard work pays off and they achieve that award, then they will be more likely to keep working hard to get that trophy or whatever it is they are working for.

So yes, giving a little kid a trophy for participating in tee-ball does make them feel better about themselves, but you can’t keep giving out participation awards and trophies their whole life.

I mean, shit, I wish I could get an A just for showing up to my classes on time but again, that is not how life works.

If you were to give a kid a participation trophy for everything they did like, "Wow, you played football but you didn’t do anything!" or "wow, you failed your test but you still tried!". That child will continue to think that they can be rewarded for doing the bare minimum.

Positive reinforcement is basically rewarding someone with a prize whether it is a trophy, or a piece of candy, etc. So if you keep positively reinforcing your child by giving them a participation trophy when they really didn’t do anything, then they will continue that same behavior, doing the bare minimum and expecting a reward. But, if you teach your kids that if they want that big shiny trophy or award, they have to work hard for it and it’s not guaranteed so they have to keep trying even when they don’t achieve it, then they will be more likely to repeat that same action.

Especially when they achieve their goal, they will understand how good it feels and wants to keep doing it. My point is, we need to stop giving out participation trophies because it will teach our kids to work hard and it is a good life lesson that can apply to almost any situation in life whether it has to do with sports, work, or even school.