Snap Out Of It, Girls, Stop Falling For Your Best Friend

Snap Out Of It, Girls, Stop Falling For Your Bestfriend

It's not always like the movies, you probably aren't meant to be with your best friend and that's the cold, hard truth and I'm not sorry for telling you this. It's not always worth it, so get it through your head and snap out of it if needed.


Don't fall in love with your best friend if any of these reasons are the truth for you. It's not fair to you or him.

Don't fall in love with your best friend because you're lonely and he gives you attention.

He showers you with compliments. He knows you well enough to know what you like, and he offers you this without the guise of expectation love can bring.

Don't fall in love with your best friend, because when you fall, you risk not having a net to catch you.

He's the one you go to with your problems. The day you decide to go out is the day you become okay with the idea of potentially becoming the problem for one another. You risk losing a lover and a friend all at once.

Don't fall in love with your best friend, because nowadays it's harder to find real friends than it is to find a lover.

People who endlessly support you as you are aren't a dime a dozen. They take time to find, nurture and keep in your life. If you've been lucky enough to have a ride or die, you shouldn't ruin that.

Don't fall in love with your best friend, because you know them too well.

You know what makes them tick already. You know how he handles affairs of the heart. And because of this, you know you deep down you can't trust him with yours.

Don't fall in love with your best friend, because watching him pick other people will continue to break your heart for as long as you let it.

You shouldn't be with someone you always make excuses for. He only does what's convenient for himself – that's all he's ever done. If ever you held priority to him, you lost it the second you dismissed any of this behavior as being okay.

Don't fall in love with your best friend, because he's already his best self with you

He's not working through insecurity because you know them all already. He's not trying to be a polished version of himself at all times because you see through the front. You two will never be more genuine than you are right now.

Don't fall in love with your best friend, because you both are just too similar.

You have almost too much in common. And despite this, you still find ways to nitpick at the little things he does that really get on your nerves. Way more than they should.

Most of all – don't fall in love with your best friend because deep down, even if you can't admit it right now, you know it will always be the image of happily ever after you're chasing. Not him.

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it


Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

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Summer = Rest?

Sometimes it feels as if we need a vacation... from our vacation.


Ah summer: Popsicles and sun burns, mixed with fresh-squeezed lemonade that local kids are pandering to make enough money for Roman candles and Black Cats. The crack of the bat can be heard among the simmering charcoal grills and Troy-bilts humming through the ever-lasting sun. School is out and children are wild. It's a paradise.

Or is it?

But after countless sports camps and tournaments, other camps, vacations, school (?) events, traveling teams, VBS, summer seems to have been sucked fun-free.

Maybe it's Hollywood and Harper Lee's fault for giving us this utopian view of what summer should look and feel like (I'm looking at you Sandlot). But how can we really rest this summer? Because everyone needs some actual rest, even adults.

First thing is do NOT pack your summer full. Say no to some things. Coaches and Families can expect too much and it's okay to say no to them. You have to. There is no time for kids to be kids anymore.

Work can take a backseat. Vacations need to be taken. Families need to reconnect.

And for all my super-scheduled people out there, please PLEASE don't schedule out your vacation. Just enjoy it.

Another bit of advice would be to put away the technology and spend some time outside. When was the last time you tried to catch lightning bugs? Or went for a swim? Or listened to birds on your front porch?

I may sound like I have an old soul, but I really feel like we have lost this connection to the outside world. Summer is all about getting a farmer's tan and getting stung once or twice. I can guarantee you that's some of the best therapy in the world.

Maybe this sounds all over the place. Maybe this sounds like me ranting. And it probably is.

But I'm telling you that this stuff matters. Don't let summer whiz by and you arrive in August more drained that you were in May. Enjoy this time with family and friends.

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