"We're just friends."
Three simple words, yet so hard to believe when It's being said. So many people are afraid of using the F word. And no, I'm not talking about that particular bad word, but one that comes pretty close to the way people associate it: friends. Not just any friendship, though, a boy/girl friendship. But wait, boys and girls can't really be just friends, can they? We would like to believe that it's capable of happening, but both society and films have brainwashed us into thinking the opposite for so long that it makes it feel like it's almost impossible to achieve. Though I'm here to break those barriers and tell you that yes, it is likely for girls and boys to be just friends without them falling in love with each other. It may not be easy, but it's possible
Unfortunately, society has taught us early on that boys and girls cannot be just friends. They have their explanations for it, saying it has to do with science and the way our bodies function with our hormones getting in the way of everything. Our emotions get the better of us too and soon we're turning into the green monster whenever our boy/girl friend is in a relationship with a person that isn't you. Although this is what they may want us to believe, it's not always true for everyone. The truth is, each and every person functions differently, so we don't all follow the same guidelines when it comes to how we're supposed to act and feel around the opposite gender. Because as hard as it is to believe, boys and girls can be around each other without wanting to take things to a more physical and intimate level. Ever heard of platonic love? Well, for those who don't, it's a deep connection between people of the opposite gender where there is no sexual desire. So yes, there is such thing as being able to have a boy/girl friendship.
Of course, people can argue that and bring up the other terrible F word: friend zone. Ah yes, a term pop culture has coined where one person in the friendship wants to further the relationship into something more but gets turned down and forever put on the back burner. Believe me, I've not only been in that type of situation, but I've also done the same thing with some of my guy friends. But you know what? I don't think it's a bad thing to do, no matter how much society and others will tell you. Because I'd rather be honest with someone instead of trying to hurt them or do something where it only benefits one person and leaves the other one unhappy. I don't understand why we have to give such bad reputations to these types of situations. It makes it feel like no matter what we do, we can never win. Which brings up my next topic of discussion: movies.
Ohh movies, how you've messed with my mind for so many years. No, wait, my whole life. Because of the way you've portrayed romance, my expectations are very high now. But one thing you continue to do is inaccurately show the way boy/girl friendships are and turn out. You've shown the same exact situation in all your romantic comedies, the only thing different are the titles. Boy and girl are friends in the beginning, boy and girl start to have feelings for one another and soon realize they belong together but not without the help of friends and family to tell them the same thing too. But then there are two scenarios that keep getting used time and time again; it's the way the relationship turns out between the once just friends. It can either go wonderful and sparks will fly and they'll live happily ever after (most of these situations in the movies usually end with a wedding, a grand gesture or just a kiss between the boy and girl that we as the movie watchers have been waiting to happen since we first saw them together on screen and just knew they belonged together). Or sometimes, which is what happens a lot of the times in real life, the relationship between them can go horribly wrong and what makes it worse is not only do they stop being in a relationship, they stop being friends too. Because let's face it, no matter how hard you may try to get back to the way things used to be before you started dating, you can never go back to being just friends after. I know a lot of people may say that it's worth taking the risk for, but I'd rather have a permanent friendship than a temporary relationship.
Maybe this didn't help at all and you're still willing to believe that boys and girls can't be just friends without one or both of them wanting more and that's okay. My idea wasn't to persuade you to switch your opinion, it instead was to open your mind to there being different thoughts on the concept. Just consider the next time you see a girl and boy together don't automatically assume that they're dating. And stop telling that boy and girl who are best friends that, "They should totally date" and "Why aren't you guys a couple already, you'd be perfect together." Because let's be real, boy/girl friends are the absolute best. My guy friends are awesome and I wouldn't trade them for anything or ever want them as more than a friend in my life. You see, a girl needs to have a guy best friend just as much as a guy needs to have a girl best friend. We each help one another out and are able to provide the necessary needs for each other. Don't believe everything society and movies tell you, boys and girls can be just friends without it turning into a relationship.Always keep your boy/girl friends close and never let them go, they're the most important person you'll ever have in your life and that's the honest truth.
To Elliot and Joe, Thanks for being the best guy friends a girl could ever ask for.
