Dating in college sucks nowadays. With dating apps that make it easier than ever to get a one night stand, f*ckboys, ghosting and being friends with benefits instead of boyfriend and girlfriend being the norm, it's easy to feel like you're not worth it. If you're the kind of girl looking for hook ups and nothing serious, all power to you, but this is for the girls looking for relationships, true love and losing hope in this screwed-up dating world.
As a girl about to graduate college in three weeks, here is my advice and some of the key things I have learned.
You're worth it. And if a guy doesn't see how amazing you are, he's not only a moron but not worth it.
In my first year after I transferred (my sophomore year), I fell for the wrong guy and he ghosted me halfway through the fall semester. I spent the rest of the year obsessing over how I could have done anything different only to find out it wasn't my fault that he treated me so poorly. Looking back, I hate that I wasted so much time pining over him because it wasn't worth it, and I'm worth so much more than that.
I don't care if the guy who ghosted you looks like a crossover between Zac Efron and Ryan Gosling. Why? Because he doesn't give a damn about you even though he makes your heart go pitter patter. He's not worth it, and I promise you that someday you'll be glad you never got serious with a guy like that. Plus, he's a dumbass for treating someone who cares about him so much so poorly.
F*ckboys run rampant in college, it sucks but it's something we have to deal with. It may seem like every guy out there is a total jerk but in reality, f*ckboys are in the minority, and there are ways to avoid them. The key is to look beyond looks when it comes to looking for good guys. Believe it or not, there are good guys out there that are absolute sweethearts that can also make your heart race. Although physical attraction is important, mutual values are even more important. Notice I use values instead of interests. It is nice to have a guy with similar interests, but similar values are the absolute key. Also, having a lot of guy friends never hurt anyone, they're awesome and often times offer things girlfriends just can't. I value my guy friends just as much as I value my girlfriends, my college experience wouldn't have been this amazing without them.
In my experience, dating apps are just full of guys that want to hook up (if you want it, go for it, no shame here). Although it can be funny and entertaining, it's a waste of time and energy if you're not looking to hook up. After my long, complicated and on-and0-off relationship with Tinder, I deleted the app permanently a year ago and refuse to go back. The post-Tinder life is the best life.
My biggest advice of all is to never lose hope. It can be tough, but whenever I lose hope I look at my parents who are happier than ever after over two decades of marriage. It's cliche and cheesy, but it's the truth: there is someone out there for everyone.
