From The Girl Who Learned To Love Herself

From The Girl Who Learned To Love Herself

It's Okay To Love Who You Are, Flaws And All
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Growing up there were a lot of things I didn't like about myself, inside and out. I've never been the popular girl with a lot of friends or the smartest girl in school. For as long as I can remember I've hated almost everything about my body. Guys didn't attach themselves to me like they did other girls my age. I blamed myself and thought that I wasn't pretty enough or maybe I didn't dress well enough. It was hard to keep up with all of the other girls when you come from a family that's not rolling in money. I have always focused on the things that I am not. Now I know that everything I'm not made me everything I am!

It's hard feeling like a social outcast when you're in school, wondering why none of the popular kids wanted to hang out with me. Was I not cool enough? Maybe I wasn't for them, but now I know that I'm cool enough for me. I watched those same people constantly change friends and always have falling outs with one another. While I had to go through my fair share of friends to separate the good ones from the bad, I think its something I was able to figure out faster than all of the so called popular kids. I found out that sometimes all you need is a small group of people to hang around because not everyone has your best interest in mind. Now I wouldn't trade my best friend and the few good people I have for anything in the world! Sometimes I do feel that I could stand to be a little more social but I'm accepting of the person that I am. As long as the people in my life want to see me do well then I'm happy, even if there's only a few of them.

It's also been incredibly difficult learning to accept this awkward body of mine. I always felt really out of place and I've been really skinny my whole life. It always been hard to find clothes that fit my body nicely. Pants were either too big at the waste or too short at the ankle. I wasn't (and still am not) developed as most girls in certain areas. It made me feel ugly and unwanted. If you ask me today, I would say there are still things that I wish I could change about my body but as time goes on I'm learning that I can't continue to compare myself to other. What works for everyone else may not be for me. So my body isn't as curvy as the next girls, and so what if I still have to deal with acne. I'm learning to be comfortable with myself flaws and all. We were all made with different body shapes for a reason and should learn to work with what we have.

You'll always be miserable trying to measure up to someone else's standards. I rarely think about what others might feel about me, I'm too busy making sure I feel good about me The sooner you accept who you are, the better! The older I get the more I learn to accept and love all that I am, from my personality to my looks. I may not be the prettiest or the most social but I'm me and that's okay! When you learn to appreciate all that you are someone else will come along and appreciate it too. Confidence in yourself doesn't go unnoticed and it's a great feeling.

Cover Image Credit: Tiny Buddha

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Everything You Will Miss If You Commit Suicide

The world needs you.
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You won’t see the sunrise or have your favorite breakfast in the morning.

Instead, your family will mourn the sunrise because it means another day without you.

You will never stay up late talking to your friends or have a bonfire on a summer night.

You won’t laugh until you cry again, or dance around and be silly.

You won’t go on another adventure. You won't drive around under the moonlight and stars.

They’ll miss you. They’ll cry.

You won’t fight with your siblings only to make up minutes later and laugh about it.

You won’t get to interrogate your sister's fiancé when the time comes.

You won’t be there to wipe away your mother’s tears when she finds out that you’re gone.

You won’t be able to hug the ones that love you while they’re waiting to wake up from the nightmare that had become their reality.

You won’t be at your grandparents funeral, speaking about the good things they did in their life.

Instead, they will be at yours.

You won’t find your purpose in life, the love of your life, get married or raise a family.

You won’t celebrate another Christmas, Easter or birthday.

You won’t turn another year older.

You will never see the places you’ve always dreamed of seeing.

You will not allow yourself the opportunity to get help.

This will be the last sunset you see.

You’ll never see the sky change from a bright blue to purples, pinks, oranges and yellows meshing together over the landscape again.

If the light has left your eyes and all you see is the darkness, know that it can get better. Let yourself get better.

This is what you will miss if you leave the world today.

This is who will care about you when you are gone.

You can change lives. But I hope it’s not at the expense of yours.

We care. People care.

Don’t let today be the end.

You don’t have to live forever sad. You can be happy. It’s not wrong to ask for help.

Thank you for staying. Thank you for fighting.

Suicide is a real problem that no one wants to talk about. I’m sure you’re no different. But we need to talk about it. There is no difference between being suicidal and committing suicide. If someone tells you they want to kill themselves, do not think they won’t do it. Do not just tell them, “Oh you’ll be fine.” Because when they aren’t, you will wonder what you could have done to help. Sit with them however long you need to and tell them it will get better. Talk to them about their problems and tell them there is help. Be the help. Get them assistance. Remind them of all the things they will miss in life.

For help, call 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Cover Image Credit: Brittani Norman

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Why Having Allergies Is Like Being In A Bad Relationship

Allergies: because your immune system kinda hates you.

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Allergies have the reigns on your life, and it's a struggle to live with them. In a way, they're a lot like a bad relationship. Here's why:

You can't go anywhere without them.

Everyone enjoys time to themselves sometimes, but it's especially annoying when you can't get away.

They always know where you are.

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There is no tricking or evading the questions. If you're around nature, they know. Trying to take extra medication to prepare or your friend is putting the dog that you're allergic to outside? Nope, won't work. Your allergies will find out and you'll react to not just that dog, but the dog that your friend had seven years ago in their old house.

There's usually a fight every day.  

Not a day goes by without an uphill battle. You can take medication and go most of the day without symptoms, but, at some point, you may still experience a small itch. Even the best medications can't protect against everything.

You're walking on eggshells trying not to upset them.

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Like I said, they know your surroundings, so that means we have to be careful. Food allergies need to stay away from those foods. Fur allergies need to stay away from those animals. Adjustments are required for every day life. It's only a little sad when I can't pet a nice dog when I'm out and about.

They seem to know your next move. 

It's your body, so it makes sense that it would know everything about what's around you, but it's still surprising how much allergies keep you on your toes.

Sometimes they fuck you up a little extra.

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A new meaning behind "you got me so fucked up" is discovered on any given day. You get used to what's considered your normal allergy level and then all of a sudden-- BAM-- you get hit by a truck. Have you ever seen a human being "melt"?

They get controlling and needy. 

Adjustments are required to live the least symptomatic life we can. And, when something comes up, they are not shy about making their presence known.

There's no such thing as "budding romance" in the springtime.

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Spring time is especially bad because of the new plant growth and pollen levels. As much as we'd love to go on cute dates all the time, sometimes we just can't. As disgusting as it sounds, the spring is time to learn about the inside of your face, especially when you have seasonal allergies on top of what you already experience.

Or anytime for that matter, it's pretty much disappointing year-round.

Your immune system just hates you. Can someone explain why some of us have pollen allergies in the middle of winter? Isn't everything supposed to be dead? Tell that to my sneezing fits and itchy eyes.

A silver-lining though: you're three steps ahead and know how to keep the ceiling up.

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At least you've usually had allergies for long enough at this point that you know tips and tricks on how to survive. You're experienced and prepared for whatever tries to tear you down. So good luck as we head into another year of allergies, whether they are seasonal or continuous, and if anyone has any secret tips, let me know.

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